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Old 02-13-2013, 03:07 AM   #1
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My boyfriend wont have sex with me but will masturbate

So I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now and live together. at the beginning of our relationship we use to have sex all the time, I really felt like he wanted me, but then something seamed to happen and there was no more foreplay and sex was really fast, he had to stop and start so much to not come and i just could not enjoy the sex. then he would never initiate sex and when I would he couldn't get it up and would tell me that he is so stressed and depressed about work and money and that when men are depressed they just don't want sex, so I tried not to be hurt and decided not to initiate sex that when he wants and he's ready he would, but this has been going on so long, we'll go months without sex. he use to tell me that he feels bad because he's going through this but I am 23 and he is 32, Im an attractive girl, guys are always hitting on me and asking me out. and its not just the sex we don't have but I don't feel like he is attracted to me anymore, it has really depressed me I feel unwanted and ugly, I feel so sad because of it, I cry because of it -and I never cry- and now its caused me to gain some weight and to make me feel like I have lost my confidence I don't feel pretty or sexy any more. we haven't had sex for months, but i find evidence in the bathroom that he is masturbating, it makes me so mad and sad because all this time I really want sex, maybe because Iam young but not having sex is driving me crazy I am always thinking about sex and I feel like I am wet all the time for nothing, like its effecting me mentally and physically. I have tried to be understanding but I am starting to feel ridiculous always thinking about sex and it hurts so much that he says he is depressed and cant have sex with me and cant get hard for me but is masturbating. why doesn't he come to me for sex? is he lying to me? is it me he doesn't want? or is he telling the truth about depression in men? and if so why can he masturbate but not have sex with me?

 
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Old 02-19-2013, 07:45 PM   #2
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Re: My boyfriend wont have sex with me but will masturbate

Been there and done that scene. Depression can do many things, it can lower the libido, but not to the point that a person would rather masterbate than actually have sex, atleast in my experience. Ask him straight out about the situation, if you do not get a clear answer (good or bad), he is hiding the truth and you need to move on. Trust me... I lived your exact situation and it really changed me and not for the better.

 
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