Relationships - Sexually Transmitted Diseases Message Board

Sytaxia · 03-19-2004, 05:58 PM

If you have been diagnosed with an STD and if you were involved in a relationship when you were diagnosed, what impact did the diagnosis have on the relationship? Alternately, what would your feelings be if you knew that you had infected your partner/been infected by your partner?

I guess I'm just worried about my relationship with my boyfriend. I'm concerned for his emotional state, since he infected me and has experienced terrible guilt. And even though I'm not upset with him, I'm worried that I might get upset later on, particularly if my health problems recur. What can I do to keep this from coming between us?

missnicole · 03-20-2004, 01:48 PM

hey girl...my only advice would be to make sure you both know that you can communicate anything to each other and to be open and honest about all your feelings and thoughts. because if u arent it will only cause you problems later. just educate yourself and make sure he does the same so that you both know all the details of what you have. i was diagnosed with hpv and gential warts at the end of december and im completely done with my treatment and things feel like they are back to normal with my boyfriend and i. with hpv, we played the blame game; blamed each other and then blamed ourselves, which is really not something you can do because theres no way of knowing who gave it to who and when unless one person was a virgin prior to the reltionship. so before i get on a big rant...just make sure you know everything you can know about your diease and make sure you are both extremely comfortable talking about everything!!

Weeping Willow · 03-21-2004, 12:25 AM

When I was diagnosed with Chlamydia I was devistated. I had been dating my current b/f for a year and 1/2 when I found out I had it. The first thing I did was accuse him of cheating because I knew I hadn't slept with anyone else. After talking to many doctors and STD hotlines I learned that it can live in the cervix for years. Since I had no symptoms and hadn't been to a gyn before then in almost 3 years I had to evaluate my love for him. It took a lot of time but I believe in my heart that he is and always has been faithful. Either one of us could have carried it into our relationship.
It's not easy but if you both are willing to work, talk, and be there for one another then you'll be okay.
Just keep that line of communication going. Good luck to you and your b/f. I hope everything works out for the best.