My ongoing battle w/depression
I am 32 years old and have struggled w/depression since the 6th grade. I've taken medication for 11 years now and am still battling my "bad days" or worse yet, "bad months".
I feel that I am entering another "bad time" right now, due to holidays, going through a divorce (our 5-year anniversary is this Friday), etc. I eat well, take vitamins, take Prozac, work out and am doing everything that I'm supposed to be doing. After I went to the gym this morning, I started crying and couldn't stop and was literally wiping my eyes as I walked into work. I felt like a big, sobbing baby. Then, sometimes the anxiety washes over me and I feel like I'm being choked. There are definitely days where I wish that God or another higher power could "erase" me and end the torture and misery. But, when I feel that low, I try to hang on and "let it pass" and reach out to family/friends. It sucks though.
I look around and it's 75 degrees, no clouds in the sky, palm trees, great job, great friends, etc. - but STILL I feel horrible inside. It's almost crippling sometimes -I can't explain it.
Depression is such a vicious demon to battle - I empathasize 100% w/anyone dealing with this. It's horrible!
Anyone reading this who is battling depression - you are not alone. Have faith that your bad time will pass eventually and things will evolve.