TLCLOVE33

Hello everyone:

everyone. I'm not sure if the incest caused my many years of depression but it sure was a huge factor. Several people in my family also suffered from depression and didn't experience incest.
I was very young


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.I would guess between 6 and 8 years old. Anyway, I had a older brother who moved in and out of home. He was in his twenties.


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The overwhelming feeling of being dirty and worthless was my identity.
My grades were F's, D's and a couple of C's.


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Note: our family was very large. Eight children, there was always plenty of noise in our home. My parents had no clue.
Anyway, the incest ceased but a deep and I mean deep hate

developed.


I also became promiscuous when I started dating.
When I was 18 I was hospitalized for depression where they gave me Thorizene.
My life was weird, un-stable and suicidal.
Until one day I realized the deep hate was hurting ME.
I prayed for the Lord to remove the hate and he did but the depression remained.
I found it hard to hold a job because the depression would paralyze me where I couldn't do anything. A dark cloud. The depression would come and go but always hang over my head ready to drop at any moment.
Finally when I was 43 years old I couldn't take it any longer. I walked into Henry Ford hospital and told them of my depression, that I didn't want to live if it meant the rest of my life would be with depression and that I heard there was a new med for treatment. Prozac.
By this time I was surrounded by interns and doctors.

They asked if I was going to kill myself. I said not at this moment but if life continues with this problem I can't go on. They gave me a prescription for Prozac and told me to see my doctor. I didn't have a doctor because I couldn't work full time thus not insurance or income. (I had a abusive boy friend who let me stay with him.)

Within a month of being on the Prozac treatment the depression was gone. Shortly thereafter I started my own business and rid myself of the abusive relationship.
I'm still not a whole person but hey! I'm a heck of a lot better. I started my own businesses deep cleaning homes and most if not all of the really messed up dirty homes I do, are of people who are depressed. I understand and if anyone out there feels or is dealing with depression get help. I'm 56 years old now and havent taken any of the anti-depression pills for at least 10 years. I'm still depression FREE. A little goofy and a tad crazied, but who isn't. God bless and get some help if you or your loved one needs it.