Laylee0412

I'm 21 years of age and almost completely hopeless and lost in finding out what is going on inside of me. This trial and error nonsense has gotten old and I can't continue life like this...I am beyond desperate in my situation.

I was only mildly depressed at age 14 and put on effexor XR which I continued until my 1st pregnancy when I was 17. Everything went very well and I had only mild postpartum depression which took me back to Effexor and the depression subsided immediately. Things were fine until I got pregnant with my 2nd child, and at the time was attending community college. I developed severe panic disorder and was treated with Zoloft, which seemed to help with the anxiety. A number of issues followed: the further along that I became, the worse it got. I quit Zoloft, and I had severe psychomotor agitation, RLS, and could not sleep at night. My OB prescribed Ambien CR which significantly reduced all of these symptoms. I literally thought I was dying because I didn't know what was wrong, and the symptoms were all so physical that I could not began to describe them to the extent that any of my docs could understand. After I had the baby, the symptoms hung around, my panic got worse, and I admitted myself into the ER when I had my worst panic attack. I was put back on Effexor, this time it was 150 mgs XR. That plus Ativan, 2 mgs twice daily by my OB. The Ativan seemed to help but I was still severely depressed and the Effexor was doing nothing....I knew it was time to seek psychiatric help. i began Prozac, which agitated me to the point where I wanted to tear my skin apart and I was hearing voices, 1 mg of Klonopin 3 X daily. This helped with the anxiety but I was still so depressed I didn't want to move. My last visit my DR put me on 200 mgs of Seroquel XR. I quit that after about 2 weeks of suffering. I couldn't force myself to move and I became so severely depressed that I didn't want to move, talk, or even be alive. I have had several occasions where I LITERALLY felt like I was going crazy, which numerous mental and physical symptoms. I am also on the Depo Provera shot. A lot of my friends and family have said that I seemed A LOT better before starting that. I'm so desperate in trying to find out what is wrong me. I love my kids so much but its so hard to force myself to get out of bed to take care of them. This is not me, and I have never been or felt this way in my entire life. ...