| Feeling Trapped
I'm 21 years old, and I've seen it all.. from death to abuse... neglect to abandoncey... And I'm not anywheres where I want to be today.. I feel stuck and not able to achieve anything. I want to be a hair dresser and make up artist.. I have the skills and talents I crave to do it almost every day.. But with my debt, anxiety, depression and no potentional in doing so. I live every day sitting.. waiting for something to happen. I've given up trying, because I just don't know how anymore. I guess you could say I'm beyond suicide.. I don't even have the potential in trying that. I just want to live my life.. and something is stopping me. I've tried seeing a counsiler.. I get there and have no clue what to say.. nothing comes to mind.. it's like my problems are blocked... I live to love.. and that is the only thing I hold on to.. But I guess you could say I love too much.. and never get loved back... and always abandoned.. So my heart hurts and is scared from top to bottom.. I've built walls and anger and self mental abuse towards myself. I just want to live free and I don't know how or what to do ... i sure don't know what is real and what isn't anymore
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