It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Share Your Depression Story Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 09-15-2011, 01:22 AM   #1
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
Posts: 1
Beia HB User
Slowly succeeding at alienating everyone

Officially, I've been diagnosed with depression. Realistically, I feel I should be straight-jacketed and taken away. Even as I listen to myself talk about my latest 'tangible' theory behind my depression to whomever will listen to me, parts of my brain call BS. It's like I'm fighting with myself, and the fight often turns against other people: too often they're the same people trying to help me. These people are saints and I haven't a clue as to why they still put up with me. And then, the self-pitying parade stomps through my head and my ever-diminishing sanity screams for it to stop. My loved ones scream for it to stop. But there's no stopping, and I'm at a loss. I don't know what to do: I judge myself, then irrationally (or rationally - who knows?!) begin to believe that others are judging me just the same. In turn, I shut down. I can't talk to others because I don't want to waste their time, as I so often feel like I'm wasting my own. And the pointless, one-sided, self-demoralizing arguments continue on...and on and on.

Today marks five years of diagnosed depression. Five years of taking the same medication diligently, every day. Five bloody years of ups and downs; days of thinking I'm cured followed by weeks of uncontrollable despair. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of it for you.

 
The following user gives a hug of support to Beia:
dinroller (12-06-2011)
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Me hnlmaa Share Your Depression Story 0 03-09-2011 04:53 PM
what i have never told anonymousbystan Share Your Depression Story 0 01-08-2011 04:45 PM
Tired of Crying Judy T Share Your Depression Story 2 06-05-2009 04:18 PM
unsure got no ideas Share Your Depression Story 1 05-06-2009 07:50 AM
my story Ruhia Share Your Depression Story 0 05-06-2009 07:11 AM

Tags
anger depression



Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Administrator (1), BlueLagoon (1), bleetchblonde (1), Madkeex (1), iAlmostDo (1), stay happy (1), sonyaclaire (1), akbounddix (1), canadiangirl38 (1)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1164), MSJayhawk (997), Apollo123 (898), Titchou (832), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (758), ladybud (745), sammy64 (666), midwest1 (665), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:26 PM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!