Well where do I start ? the beginning i think will be the best.
Me and James have been together for 8 years meeting in 1999 we are a happy couple and get on very well. in 2003 we decided to try for children or should i say I wanted to try it did not take much to get jams to agree we had a lot of fun trying but by 2005 we still had not conceived we was ref by our local doctor to chesterfield royal hospital to see Miss J R Parratt a gynaecologist who sent me for test to see what was wrong in may 2005. I had a salpingography this is where they but ink/dye in to my womb and I could see that both my fallopian tubes was blocked this hurt a lot and i new the answer before we went back to see Miss Parratt.
THE DAY MY LIFE ENDED
As i sat there i could hear Miss Parratt talking but could not make seance
of what she was saying Miss Parratt confirmed what i new and she also told me that I was not ovulating regularly and my fallopian tubes are blocked, she thought the best way for me to get pregnant would be IVF and it would be the only way it could happen. It tuck a little bit for it to sink in then i started to cry what the most natural thing in the world for a woman to do was have children, the one thing I really wanted and i would never do it not without help. i felt sick and if i am honest i could of slit my wrist my world gone. How did James feel i don't Know he never talked to me about it. He to had tests everything was fine as we already new he made a point of telling everyone he has a son already this hurt it was all my fault we could never have children not the most supportive partner.
First course of IVF
In 2006 we was granted funding for IVF we started in September my first injections i was frightened and did not what expect but managed the injections OK. this was a hard time for me felt very alone my mood was terrible i was up and down due to the meds and not much support from James again he already has a son as he told everyone its not him who has the problem thinking back it was his way of dealing with it. as the time moved closer to egg retrieval still felt alone James just said tell me when you want me there. i don't know maybe this is a man thing but I really needed James and felt alone. They collected 12 eggs eleven matured only eight fertilised we had two put back none of the remaining was any good to be frozen this was very disappointing. as we sat waiting to see if the two put back would take it was hard but we thought it would work we did are best to get on with life but it was always there in my mind. had a bleed on the 19th of oct i did my pregnancy test on the 22nd oct with a negative result which we new coz of the bleed i was devastated..
Second course of IVF
Well here we go again a year later this time things are hard not only for me but for James. its been a ruff year things have gone from bad to worse regarding work so starting IVF was postponed a few times we was planing to start at the beginning of the year but that was unrealistic. We decided to start September but ended up starting October which was all OK until James new business partner pulled out which left us in a bit of a mess
as it was to late to put on hold as i had started to inject this has put a lot of stress on me but more on James as i don't drive he needs to take me to care at Nottingham a lot of fall outs just what we both did not need got a lot a support from work this time as I never told them last time.
James was with me for this as he had to be all very nerves as well as excited. 10 eggs collected well done to the both of us.
Well we did well out of the 10 collected 8 have gone on to fertilise and all good embryos. Two put back this i found very painfully but unfortunately James could not come with me but my mum did she was very supportive. 6 frozen this time yippee
This is hard never have ever wanted to smoke so many fags (quit smoking) the stress its to much to take its hard, but this is i feel the easy week next week will be hard it was in the second week last time that I started to bleed. Every time i get a cramp i am off to the toilet to check if I have started to bleed. i don't know if to feel excited or not i have a feeling its not worked its been a long 6 days since they put the embryos back, 2 more days and i should be due on i normally come on on the 8th of the month.
one more week i do the test on the 16th nov this feels a long way away. 16th has come and the test is negative.
Third Course of IVF
Here we go again another year later.
Embryo Replacement was 9days ago fingers crossed it will work this time:-) do the test on 13th August 08.