Thanks Alice,
Good Luck with your methadone program. This somewhat blows me away that you were started on 30mg and increased up to 105mg!! Do they do blood tests or urinalysis to determine where you need to be?? Is there talk of an "end" when you'll be taken off of the methadone? If so, I'd love to know how they'll go about it!
As far as support groups, I think they are great. Being able to see and hear someone with the same or worse issues should be comforting. My wife would love to just sit in a room full of people that have come through this, hearing that "it can be done." Regarding your thoughts, you may want to just sit and listen to a few meetings. When you do decide to share, don't hide anything!! Drug Free is Drug Free. There would be no benefit in you leaving the meeting with a guilty conscience!
It truly hurts me to hear you think of meds as your "best friend." They are your worst enemy, robbing you (and those around you) of a much happier life!! Are you familiar with the song, "What a Friend We Have In Jesus" -- now there's a true friend, forever!
My wife and I were both raised Southern Baptist churches. She has stopped going, but I go every week -- usually with the kids. There is not a sermon that goes by that I fail to hear something I feel would be inspirational to her. Anyway, my point is that church can be good therapy, good socially, and a place to develop a Friend (that will not let you down) for eternity!
Keep us posted on you progress!!
aNewman