My husband's cancer is spreading and he is stage four already

MaryP · 06-26-2002, 01:49 AM

I am just so sad.

He was DX in March - he went in for pneumonia and came out w/stage four lung cancer...a SHOCK to us.

He had 15 rounds of radiation to his brain for the brain cancer...and 5 rounds of chemo for the lung. He was doing so well...until last week...he stopped eating and drinking and just sleeps all the time. If he eats/drinks - he vomits and/or has diarrhea. He went in on Fri and on Sat night for IV hydration....he has a fever too...but tests did not show any infection...so it was unexplained...it is gone now.

We found out today his last CAT scan showed the tumor in his lung - where the cancer originated - has grown. WE ARE SICK.

Tomorrow morning he goes for another CAT scan - this time the pelvis as the oncologist feels the not eating, not having an appetite...being listless, etc., COULD be indicative of the cancer spreading to his liver...and/or other areas...DESPITE all that radiation and chemo. WOW...what a shock. He was fine 1.5 weeks ago...and now he is not the same. I do not think this is good AT ALL...

Is this a sign of the end nearing? I am scared out of my mind. He is 47 years old...TOO young to die.

Maybe another type of chemo can help...he gets Taxol now...with something w/a C in it...sorry I do not remember the name.

Anyone been through this w/a loved one...and if so...what signs are signs of the end nearing...I hate to even ask this...but I need to prepare myself.

TY,

Mary

peeps1111 · 06-26-2002, 02:06 AM

Mary:
My sister also stopped eating and drinking and became dehydrated. I thought it was the end too but they put her on decadron (a steroid) to reduce the brain swelling from the brain tumor and the radiation. They also gave her IV fluids in the home for two weeks. She just started the new drug, Iressa. She is like a different person. She was only on the decadron for one day and we went out for lunch. I think it was because the brain tumor was affecting her appetite. Good luck. Has your husband been on decadron at all? You can only take it, I think, for a few months but that may be enough time to do another chemo or get on this Iressa and see if that works. It is so scary and horrible. I wish you luck.

LeisaH · 06-26-2002, 08:24 PM

Mom's Cancer has too progressed. She is on Iressa and now in the hospital. She no longer takes the vits. and herbs. She is on 100% oxegen, no for 2 weeks after she coughed up blood and could no longer catch her breath. The cancer shows up a week later in her liver and about 4 days after in her lympyh nodes. She has just finished the radiation for the lymph nodes and upper chest. She is now eating less and sleeping more. Her docs favorite expression right now is "her sickness is spreading" They no longer call it cancer (which ticks me off!) The docs figure that she has only about a month now to live. I too am scared, not only for me, but for my dad, and my children. No one should go through this. I am sorry.

MaryP · 06-27-2002, 01:01 AM

Thank You both for the replies.

Yes, my husband was on Decadron when he was released from the hosptial...and WOW did he eat...he put on 15 pounds the month he was on it - which he needed as he had lost so much weight from the pneumonia and the surgery he had to save his life - they had to drain his lungs and his heart sac...three incisions.

I will call and ask about Iressa...I believe we heard about it via an article in a magazine...the Taxol is not doing its job obviously. I swear I have to 'play doctor' and I don't have the white coat...but his oncologist is just too darn laid back and we want him to be AGGRESSIVE w/this cancer. Geesh. I called the nurse yesterday - and told her I need to speak to the oncologist...she said he just got back from the Bahamas...and is now just catching up!!! I was LIVID...I threatened to pull him out of that cancer center and put him in another one...I just could not BELIEVE she had the GAUL to say that to me...I told her I COULD CARE LESS about the doc's trip...MY HUSBAND IS DYING...I NEED TO SPEAK TO HIM NOW...he was put right on the phone - and I got assertive w/him...and got his med's called in and action taken...I should be the doctor the way his oncologist is. GRRRRR...it boils my blood as we hired him to HELP US...not aggravate us.

I am sorry for you both...I know how hard this is...I have two children and we will be without him someday soon...the prognosis was less than one year...and that is a scary, tough reality. I will lose my soul-mate...my best friend...the love of my life - and my poor children will lose their Dad.

God Bless,

Mary

BeautifulMess · 06-27-2002, 10:00 AM

I AM LITERALLY IN TEARS,,,, I am so sorry to hear all of your dilemas. I have always been afraid of death, not really mine but my family, the people i love. I try to avoid people , and not connect, so that when that day does come,,, i wont be too upset and unable to deal with it.
You, Mary, are so courageous and it will take your optimism and support, as well as positive outlook, to keep your husband around longer. I truly believe in the positive. It wont change the matters at hand, but it will provide you both with the peace of mind it takes to endure such a situation. STAY STRONG,, KEEP THE FAITH,,You are in my prayers.
May God Bless Each of Us