My husband's cancer is spreading and he is stage four already - Page 2

MaryP · 06-28-2002, 04:54 AM

Hi,

Well we found out today that the cancer did not spread...thank GOD!!!!!! The doctor called him in Marinol to stimulate his appetite - but it took my research and the good advice of the many here who kindly share - to get the doctor going...that is not right. I asked about a new chemo as the cancer is not shrinking/going away - from the Taxol...and the oncologist said, "Yes, you are probably correct. I will go ahead and change it now." I MEAN REALLY! It took ME AGAIN getting the doctor to even CHANGE the chemo...what do we even pay him for?! OH I am just so upset about that.

SHAME on that doctor.

I want my husband to have THE best care...and he is in one of the best cancer center's in our area...trouble is - there are only TWO oncologists there...for all those patients...so I am going top notch...I made him an appointment w/another cancer center in our area - this one is THE best one - we will have to pay for half...the one he is at now our ins. covers 100%...but I don't care about the money and believe me we are NOT rich...we are comfortable - or I should say we WERE comfortable - my husband has not worked...he barely gets out of bed...he is tired all the time and weak...the poor man.

So...we lived on our savings - that is gone now...it has been hard - but I would rather sell my house and lose everything and be in an apartment again as we were when we were first married than to lose him because a doctor is not aggressive enough due to him being in 'patient overload'. UGG.

Thanks for listening...we did get that terrific news today - no spread...YEAH...now to get that cancer to SHRINK AND GO AWAY...

Choosing Hope,

Mary

peeps1111 · 07-11-2002, 08:59 PM

Dear Mary:
I agree you have to be very aggressive. We have a system. Whenever my sister goes to the dr., I go with her, along with her husband and a friend. If you want to find the Iressa yourself,call Astra Zenica, the drug company, and find out where they are doing the compassionate use studies. The drug is free in the study. We got mixed news yesterday. My sister's lung tumor has shrunk but her kidney tumor seems to be causing problems. We will move on to the next thing though if the Iressa doesn't work. They told her a few weeks ago to get hospice but she is fighting and told them she is not ready to die yet. She is only 39 and also has two children.

Good luck and keep fighting. Did you have your husband apply for Social Security Disability? He has to be out of work for 6 mos., then he can get it.

MaryP · 07-16-2002, 04:09 AM

Hi,

Yes, my husband applied for SSD. Actually, I set that up for us when he was still in the hospital after the pnemonia that almost killed him - when they found the cancer...within two days I called our my ins. agent to get a loan on a policy as I knew he would be out of work and that took a good three weeks and we got it...now the SSD is taking forever...but yep...6 months is the way they do it. He just got his first SSI check TODAY...we about fell over.

FINALLY...that will hold us until the SSD kicks in...we also get food stamps...and he is covered under Medicaid - but not me and the kids - once he stopped working - his boss cut our insuracne...so me and my children are not insured and that worries me.

It has been hard...no work - no check...thankfully his parent's have money and they took over paying our bills...God Bless them. They cannot however do this forever...so we are looking into filing bankruptcy so we don't lose the house. We are not behind on any payments for anything...yet...but we looked ahead to the future and we want to prevent that so perhaps we can be freed up from some debt...I am about to start a thread on bankruptcy as I have some specific questions for anyone who filed and got to keep their home...if their mortgage co. lowered their payments so they could afford to stay there.

WHEW...it has been rough...VERY stressful.

How is your sister now? I hope she is better...I will keep her in my prayers...I pray for ALL who have cancer as I now 'see' what it does - not just to the patient - but anyone who loves the patient. It is sad and hard.

Take care,

Mary P

WorriedDaughter · 07-16-2002, 05:25 PM

Hi Mary, I read through all the postings and was very happy to read at the end that it stopped spreading. My dad is 66, had rectal cancer and after chemo and radiation, he suffered 50% upper and lower bowel damage and had to have more surgery. He recently found out it had metasised to the spine and has grown and within the last week found out that two abdomen lymph nodes have cancer and they are watching two spots on his lungs. They started him last week on Saltz Regime (a double whammy chemo drug) and he become so sick he was admitted to the hospital today for dehyration.. he will not eat and drinks little. He is 5'9" and down to 135 pounds. The doctors say once it has spread that the best news you can hear is that is stopped and then take it one day at a time, so I am so happy you received this news for your husband and I am hoping for the same for dad.

MaryP · 07-17-2002, 05:49 AM

Hi,

I hope the same for your Dad too. This is a very hard road to travel down...I know.

It is ESP hard when they are back in the hospital...I fear that everyday as my husband lost his appetite too...and he does not want to drink anything.

My husband is VERY thin...he lost more weight recently and it is sad. He drinks Boost and/or Ensure...and tries to eat. Does you Dad drink Boost and/or Ensure? It has about 300 or so calories and lots of vitamins and is supposed to help for weight gain.

Hang in there,

Mary