don't want to cry at my wedding (man)

[baldbart007]

I have a problem that is causing me great anxiety.
If I start to cry I am incapable of speech.....I sob, and carry on terribly, to my huge embarassment. I am due to get married in july this year (05) and am dreading it now, as i am going to cry with the pure joy of it all, and then what do i do? I have vows to make, speeches to get through etc.
I accept that it is OK to cry, but when it disables me so, what do I do?
I have even insisted that my involvement consists of simply saying "I do" or similar. Even then there is a good chance I may not even be able to blurt THAT out without bawling my heart out.
Oh I hope desperatley that someone can give me some help with this.......
More info.......I was married before, and had the same fears, an understanding cleric suggested I had a drink prior to the ceremony, but even with booze in me, the day was ruined for me as my bottom lip trembled uncontrollably as if i were at a funeral! till finally i sobbed like a baby.
people wondered what the hell was going on! and in spite of it being "acceptable" these days i really do not want to behave that way. my bride to be deserves better if nothing else.
Please help if you can......thanks

[Marie55]

Try taking deep breaths and very slow exhales when in stressful situations. This helps calm the nervous system. Start practicing now so you will have it down pat by time of the wedding! Look up hyperventilation and learn how to breathe properly. When we are under stress we tend to hyperventilate.

[washee]

Go to the Dr. and get a perscription for an anxiety drug. 1mg of Ativan q4hr would surely be effective, or even propranolol. I'm not condoneing the use of pills, but for this special occasion you want to enjoy it. P.S My hubby is a wedding DJ and it's not such an odd thing for the groom to cry these days Good luck

[Gainup]

Hi,

When I (woman) got married, I thought the same thing would happen to me. I was lucky, our clergy is a good friend of mine so I felt better standing up there. One thing my counselor suggested was to have our backs to the crowd. I know it may sound impersonal to them, but if it's what you need to do, then you should do it. I was amazingly under control at my wedding, not sure how I did it. I do like the idea of a few drinks before the ceremony though.

Congrats!!