How long does it take to feel normal?

[Jasmine3704]

Hey buzz - Well, no I didnt. I was ready to. I knew what I was going to say, but I didnt do it. I kept telling myself that I have to, whats the worst that can happen, etc etc. But then when I saw him I was literally shaking thinking about NOT walking out of there with my script. I dont know. Then I keep telling myself that I'll wait until I have the RFA done on the 15th and then I'll be able to do this. See, I have no control over my own thinking anymore. I thought I was stronger than this, but I am not. I feel like a fraud coming here and I hope you guys dont think I'm not serious about this. I am. I keep coming up with reasons why I can/should wait. Like, let me just get through Christmas so the Holidays aren't ruined. Or let me just wait till I have my procedure done and then I'll only have to deal with the w/d and not the pain on top of it.
I really wish I could go into rehab. But I can't. I can't be gone that long. God this sucks.
I mean you guys who have problems with oxys know the real deal that i am going thru here. What is really the best way to do this? My doctor says that tapering off is the only safe way to come off high doses of oxys. True? But if it's too easy I might not learn my lesson either. I am really in an internal turmoil over this.

[buzzkiller]

Jas,

You are alot stronger than you think. I never though I could do it, but once it was done it was done there was not turning back. The hardest thing was being honest with myself first, I knew that the only way to get this done was to tell my PM doctor what I was doing. Tina did it, and everyone on these boards were behind me when I went to the doctor. I had to cut off my source. I told them to write in my chart to NEVER give me Oxy again. I have no control over the drug. I have slowly been tapering off the percs and am down to about 20-25mg a day. Thats down from 200 or so. Cutting off my source was the second step, the first step was coming on these boards and bareing my soul to strangers, they took me and wrapped their hearts around mine. They held me up as I slipped after the divorce papers and my wife leaving. They are still there. No one here will judge you here, everyone here knows alot about what your going through. The thing that scared me off the oxy was reading that, and I hate to quote a unverfied source but the percent was high that go from oxy to heroin, and I did not want that. Stay with us Jas, using or not, post,talk, to us. Ya never know when someone is going to say that one thing that strikes home to you, that clicks and makes you make the choices you have got to make. Please stay with us.

Dale

[Vickyuser]

Dale
Look how far you have come!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jasmine you have taken the first step. The desire to quit is powerful. Use it to your advantage. Keep strong. We are all behind you. I quit vikes, ultracet, and ambien Oct 3 with the help, support and love from these boards. I also have pain issues but find that the pain is actually better off OC's. Go fiqure.(I did read this from other posts) I can control it with Tylenol Arthritis and also aspirin. Aleve is also good. Keep posting and know that we are here to help.

Vicky

[sk777]

Jasmine, I don't think there's any chance you will find it "too easy." Even tapering is really hard.

I kept putting off w/d to get past a deadline but then I realized I have a business trip and then the holidays, I was so tired of the treadmill I just jumped off and flushed it all. Not that you should, if you are on really high dose, but it's never going to be a good time. There will always be something. I quit right before a family vacation and a huge deadline and I'm 11 days clean and wouldn't change a thing. My deadline is here and I will deal with it. I did have to cancel the family thing, too sick at the time.

Holidays might be a good time to quit, if you have a job where the holidays means some time off and not too busy. (If you work in retail, I take it all back!)

Jasmine, I am giant wussy baby and while I am still in w/d, I have never been more relieved in my life to be off the treadmill and feeling better. Every day is a day closer to "normal."

Also, I agree w/ Dale. This is the first place I bared my soul and realized I was an addict. And nobody judged me or told me to stop whining or that I was a drug-addled loser. We all know how you feel. And that you'll stop when you're ready.

You're lucky to have a doctor to help you with this, me too.

[buzzkiller]

Just wondering how your doing ?