alcohol, ultram and xanax...

[MsMinn]

Hi everyone,
I have posted here before and read the posts quite a bit. I think there are a lot of brave folks here who are taking this stuff on and trying to change.

ok, so here's where I am at. I am on my 14th day free of alcohol. I went a year sober that ended in March, then tried moderation for 6 months. Gradually I went right back to my old drinking levels (about 750 ml wine per night, more on w/e)The bad thing is that I also added on an ultram habit a couple months ago, thinking it would "help" me moderate...lol. I was addicted to it once before when I was sober from drinking. I only took it for less than 2 months but was up to about 10 pills/day. I decided I wasn't doing justice to my sobriety so went cold turkey and spent a weekend in hell because I had no idea it would be so bad. My doc said it wasn't addictive. ha.This time, I am tapering on the ultram. I am down to 2.5 50mg pills a day starting yesterday, down from 3 per day....sometimes going over by 1. Oh and I also take lexapro for depression and anxiety. I think this is why the ultram was a bit of a high for me because it does boost the seratonin. My doc gave me a script for xanax for my anxiety a couple weeks ago. I have been taking .25 or .50 mg of it only at night to take the edge off the alcohol and ultram detox. Am I playing with fire here and just putting myself in danger of yet another addiction on my already full plate? I'm not tempted to take it during the day...I just feel like I need a break by the end of the day and I'm trying to avoid the pain I went thru last time when WD from ultram. I already feel the headachy WD stuff from tapering. REading the post about the xanax WD taper and withdrawal scared me though.
Thanks for listening...any advice is appreciated
Minni

[MsMinn]

anyone here?
I guess my problem is not relatable to anyone here. Oh well...

[LisaV]

Hey Ms. Minn,

I can't comment on your specific condition, but I have in the past had an issue with hydros and alcohol. I have also been on and off of SSRI's such as Lexapro (and then some) for anxiety, and I am still on Buspar, which isn't an SSRI but it is for anxiety, and Clonazapem, and now Trileptal, an anti-seizure med they also use for mood imbalance, that has replaced the SSRI's.

In short, everything you take will play with the homeostasis of your body. Homeostasis (so I was told) is the process your body goes through to even itself out. We feel like crap when we take drugs or drink, or even take prescribed meds, because all day your body is trying to do what is needed to feel normal and balanced. I was waking up every day and, within an hour, would have high blood pressure and a rapid heart rate. My regular Doc started playing with my anxiety meds, but did refer me to another Psych doc to manage the RX's. She explained the homeostasis of the body and it really hit home. Whether you are taking hydros, alcohol, smoking, eating poorly, anything...your body is going to try to even out. I am no scientist, but it really made sense to me.

Every day, even after I stopped the hydros, I was still drinking, moderately but frequently, and I am still on certain prescribed drugs. My body all day is fighting to be normal. So, I just wanted to post this as a general comment that until you eat right, exercise, quit any substance, prescribed or not, you will feel the effects of your body trying to balance itself. That's why for a few hours a day you may feel OK or normal. It's at that time your body may feel balanced. I know this doesn't answer your question, I just found the information I got this week applies to many things I was/am doing. I guess we forget what we were taught to get the right food and water, vitamins, and exercise. Substance abuse, prescribed or not, makes the body work harder to feel normal.

I hope you do what you need to do to get your body in better shape. I am trying my darndest to do it, and it is hard, but knowledge is power and I kind of get it now. The hard part is getting there for many of us.

Good luck Ms. Minn, and I'll pray you have good night's sleep and a good day tomorrow.

Lisa

[LisaV]

One more thing...I am not suggesting you stop taking what your doctor prescribed to you. I got many benefits from some of the SSRI's that outweighed the problems. I just had other problems, and I am just uncertain of how to feel normal. Like my Psych said, don't go off of everything wandering around the earth sick if you really need help with an RX for anxiety or depression. But, for me, I need to start from scratch since I was being treated at the same time I was addicted to hydros and alcohol.

Lisa

[MsMinn]

Thanks Lisa,
It's so nice to be heard!! Thanks so much for your reply!
What you said about the homeostasis makes sense to me. My goal is to get off everything except the Lexapro for now. I can't do it all at once on my own though. It's just too hard and I fear total failure and relapse back into drinking if I do.
The thing that sucks about the xanax is that even though I don't take much and only at night. I think it's making me groggy in the morning so I am unable to do the natural things (like exercise) that will make me feel better. It's like being stuck in a loop.
My priorities currently are to get off the ultram and stay alcohol free. I just don't want to get dependent on the xanax in the meantime.
Perhaps I will try to take 1/2 of a .25 tonight and see if that still helps the anxiety but perhaps less groggy in the morning...
Minni