Who can help?

[georginia]

Originally Posted by Goochie

Thanks for your input.

So, our dilemma is that he appears to be learning - the school does 3x yearly testing and he shows progress. Paradoxically, he has the highest scores in subjects he usually receives Cs in, most scores in the gifted range for the accellerated grade. His final grades are NOT failing - he gets As, Bs and Cs on his report card.

His peer social skills are pretty good - outside our family! One of the reasons his teachers skipped him up was that he related better to older kids. He does fairly well socially with other kids, and hangs out with the "popular" kids. Sigh...

Male teachers tend to think less of his behavior than female teachers. I'm not sure if he relates better to the guys or if they excuse more behaviors or if his behavior is better for them - he does get more hyper if he feels constrained.

So who do I turn to --School social worker, private psychologist, pediatrician? Maybe I should be the one medicated!

It does sound like your son is add.I would go to the school psychologist and get him tested and they will refer you or his pediatrician will to a psychiarist.They do have patches out for add or adhd.If you just let it go he will have problems later with jobs ect.If you get it taken care of he might outgrow it my son did.

[Goochie]

Thanks everyone,

I spoke to the school principal and he is going to meet with his teachers and the school psychologist. He will ask the teachers to keep a log of when negative behaviors occur. The principal seemed to believe the case was probably mild ADHD, but agreed medication should be off the table at this point and we should try other inteventions that have worked for other kids he's dealt with for a little while. The principal actually has a son with probable ADHD and believes he has it as well, but has used methods other than medication to control the negative aspects of the condition. I think we''ll try this for a while, and see if it works. I look at like blood pressure medication, diet and exercise should be the first option, but if symptoms can't be controlled, medication should be used. If behavior techniques don't work we can always go another route.

I am also leery of a diagnosis as we are self insured and if we ever switch carriers we probably won't be able to get coverage for my son if we get an official diagnosis.

[MystyDeb]

Goochie,

My son has ADD/ODD. Hes 14 and we have to have him on meds...adderol for the ADD and risperdal for the ODD. The adderal helps him concentrate at school...but it makes him "annoyed". He holds that down at school, then comes home a tyrant.

I would avoid meds if at all possible. When you add meds, you add side effects. As difficult as it seems right now, your son sounds pretty mild to me. I have worked in schools and ran a daycare for years, and he sounds pretty normal for an intelligent boy .
If you arent sure how he compares to others his age...ask to work in the classroom with his teachers (especially the ones he doesnt like...?)
Our son is absolutely loved by many teachers, but there are a few that he drives nuts. We found out that the teachers that hate him...had him under a microscope...sitting right in front of them. When they moved him to the back, they both did better.

Is he in a "High-Cap" class? In our school, the high cap teacher had a system allowing the kids to "take a break" at times when they felt bored...and they could go work on whatever was their favorite subject. They still had to listen to instruction, and finish all work, but they seemed to settle down when they knew if it got too bad they had an "out".

I very much agree with the post suggesting you look at his diet. I have read some studies that suggest that food colorings can affect ADD. I have kept an eye on my son and would agree with that. I try to get him to avoid highly colored/preserved foods.

You may want to break down his behavior into specific problems and try putting a reward system in place. This doesnt usually work for kids with strong ADD but it may be the solution in your case

Deb

[WorldFallsUp123]

I was diagnosed with a severe case of Attention Defecit Disorder in first grade. I remember my own mother coming home with books upon books about it. I took medication until sixth grade or so. We stopped it due to the heart complication some medcations cause. Through out middle school and high school I learned to deal with it. Your son, with or without, medication is gonna take some years to get used to his A.D.D. if he is diagnosed. Just be patient and give your full support. Maybe if he tries playing some music or some other sounds while he studies or reads at home that might help him focus some. That is what I would do. I would play some music and that would really help my focus.

[michael178]

Did he get expelled from Nursery SChool. Did the nun who taught him in second grade refuse to ever teach again ( I think it was after I cet the braid off the girl
in font of me), those are the tests that I passed for my ADD certification, along with a few others that I still do not reveal. Did he caused social workers to come to house to see what was going on...There are tests, and then there are real tests.
And I wouldn't trade my adventures from ADD with anyone. Read the hunter/farmer theory of ADD if you really want to find out about it.