Hmmmmm...... - Page 2

shellbelle · 07-07-2007, 08:38 PM

The hearing aid story took me back to about 7 years ago when my dear mother in law first starting showing some early signs of dementia. She already wore a hearing aid and my son took her to get an upgraded one.

We were visiting one day and he noticed she had the old hearing aid in, though it had no battery in it, and she had no idea where the new one was and refused to give up the old one when he asked for it. She is a real sweet pea so it was so strange to see her put up such a fight over something that seemed so silly, but I already knew things weren't right with her and suspected dementia/alzheimers.

My husband is their only child and is very close to his parents, so it was heartbreaking to see him get aggravated with his poor mother over something she couldn't control. We had just moved his parents to the town where we live because I was pregnant with our first child. I'm sure it added to his poor mom's confusion, but I still think it was the best decision, because we were able to look after them and spend lots of time together. And once they moved here, we found a wonderful geriatric dr. for both of them, who diagnosed her and started her on Aricept, which I believe really gave us a blessed 4 or 5 years where the progress of the disease was fairly slow and she got to know her granddaughter, who will have wonderful memories of her beautiful grandmother and know how much she adored her.

Sadly, the last year of so her decline hastened, and in March she suffered a stroke and lost much of the use of her right side, so we were not not able to care for her at home any longer. But we were fortnuate to find a very good nursing home just a 10 minute drive from here, so I'm very grateful for that.

The hearing aid story just made me look back on what a long, sad journey it's been. We did our best and I truly know my dear MIL knows that, but my heart is broken that she has this burden to bear.

Hugs to all and a Happy Weekend!
Shell

LuvMyLilDoggie · 07-07-2007, 09:39 PM

Hi neighbor! Well almost....I'm in northern Illinois near Chicago.

I'm so sorry your MIl has had to endure this disease and stroke. It sounds like you had a very nice relationship with your MIL. How fortunate for her that she has a DIL like you who loves her and cares so much about her.

Love, Barb

Turquoise · 07-08-2007, 10:23 AM

Take Barb's entry and substitute glasses, dentures, jewelry etc into it.

My MIL has been asking for her hearing aids for months. She lost them before she moved into the dementia unit. We found them among her personal effects and kept them because we did not feel she could manage them. Well, I finally talked my husband into giving her one of them to see how she would do. We asked the nurse about taking it away from her at night and putting it in in the morning. It lasted 2 days and it disappeared. My MIL told us the aide stole it.

She started about it again almost immediately.After a couple of months I again persuaded my husband to give her the other one. Well, now she says they don't give it to her. At least she's not complaining about it. Once it's gone there won't be anymore. At $3000 for a pair it's stupid to buy them just to be lost.

The neurologist we took her to told us a story about his mom who had AD. She kept losing her dentures. They had them made about 3 times and finally said no more. She doesn't even realize she doesn't have them.

My MIL was complaining about her glasses. She's lost 3 pair and that' s it for glasses. She never did need them to read anyway. We have to be aware of their needs and honor the ones they can manage. All others will eventually be forgotten by them.

But at least we tried. Now when she complains about not having something unless it's something she can eat we ignore it.

Turquoise

LuvMyLilDoggie · 07-08-2007, 10:24 PM

Dad lost his partials too. Had another set made and he says they don't fit right. So he doesn't wear them.

I got a call from my sister today. She took dad to an ENT. Dad's been ahving pain in his jaw on and off for a while. The neurologist couldn't find anything wrong. The ENT wants to check the nerves in his face. I can't see him allowing them to do a nerve conduction study on his face and neck. I went through one of those from my right hand, up my arm and into my neck. They use electric currents and needles. That is going to make him go nuts! They want to see if he has any nerve damage besides the nerve problem he already has in his cheek.

I'm kind of scared though because the ENT and neurologist are thinking his face pain might be due to the meningioma he has in his brain. They both told my sister that if the meningioma has grown, that could be his problem. We both know that dad cannot have surgery. He wouldn't live through it because of his heart. He has congestive heart failure and flatlined twice when he was going through a routine angiogram. I was later told that dad could never go under general anesthesia again because he would die.

If it's not one thing, it's another.....

Love, Barb

Martha H · 07-09-2007, 08:12 AM

Barb, that is so scary. I'm sorry for you and your family. I hope it won't need surgery. However, when Mom broke her hip after being in treatment for heart failure for about 4 years, they also didn't think she could get through general anesthesia. They tried a spinal, but as an Alzheimer patient there was no way Mom would cooperate with that - and they did give her general. She did survive and her mind was no worse afterwards. So one never knows for sure...

Love and prayers,

Martha