Adderall Advice

[magnolialady]

Even though I am "bone-tired" I felt I needed to post my unique experience with Adderall, prescribed for the same exact reasons, fatigue and brain fog. Diagnosed 15 years ago with Fibro, it overtook me 3 years ago, taking a healthy active creative person down to wishing I would just die. Never suicidal because there is always hope, but just plain miserable. I sought help from my pcp for 2 years trying every antidepressant the drug companies are pushing right now and none worked. He finally gave up on me and referred me to a psychiatrist. On my first visit I told him all I want is some energy to get me back on my feet and I will work myself back to where I want to be. He started me on Adderall regular the same as your doc. I went back for a followup and told him I might as well be eating candy. He upped me to 40 mg. a day too, and when I went to see him 15 days later I was totally amazed at what I had discovered. I had been "waiting" for all this energy to hit me so I could speed through my dirty house and finally see some results from taking a pill. It Never Happened. What did happen was a wonderful lifting of the depression, ceased the crying spells immediately and allowed my brain to say..."you've got to help yourself". I forced myself to start walking again on my treadmill and after a week you would have thought I had conquered the world. Now, with my doctor's okay, I space out the time between pills and the amount. I can't take a "holiday" as the depression comes bouncing back the next day, and if I have to live on Adderall for the rest of my life hey it's better than having no life at all. Geez I'm 56, I have to do what I have to do. I did discover that taking 20 mg. in the morning is better for me (I thought mornings were naturally my best time of the day) and then 5, 10, or 20 mg. by 2:00. This is the dose I change around. I did try provigil...I felt like a zombie stuck in mud too on that. I couldn't even lay down and rest, forget napping. My rheumy recently added Klonopin to help me sleep at night even though I told him I had been taking Xanax .5 mg. for 6years for that reason. OMG if Elvis felt like I did he is in a better place. Uppers (adderall) and downers (klonopin) only work for drug addicts or people taking it for reasons other than medical. I dropped the klonopin like a hot potatoe and 2 days later I was back to my normal self. After that experience I am satisfied with Xanax' 5 hours of sleep because when I get up in the morning it's out of my system. It's not fighting the Adderall. I have also, which no pill will do, started to accept my limitations as my new way of life and it's ok. Fibro brings on the worse kind of depression because it's not a chemical imbalance that a pill will improve, it's reality. Fibro will not leave you day or night, there is no pill that helps me with the pain and soreness and I struggle to sleep. I sure hope for the younger patients (like you) they find "something, anything"...to alleviate the fatigue first and I really think the other problems associated with fibro would improve naturally just from that. The medical field just doesn't get it because they can't prove on paper what is causing it. I had the trauma to the head theory, being involved in an accident when I was young, head cracking the windshield. Who knows? Who cares...just find us some relief. Didn't mean to go on and on, it's just my heart breaks when I read posts from young women starting on the same road that I've been down. I wish my mother were alive so I could tell her...mama you were right about experience being the best teacher. Now I tell my children that and I see that "same look" I had. Oh well. Take care and please don't hesitate to ask any questions I didn't answer in this loooong post. And please don't give up, just try to start accepting now the changes that Fibro demands (until they find a cure?), because when you add menopause on top of Fibro....you need to be ready for anything.

[Jenn4508]

magnolialady - what a wonderful post. A lot of insight went into this. Before I get started let me apologize as I know I will ramble as it is rainy here and the fibro fog is on a "high alert" level along with the pain. I know you talked about menopause and what that may bring along however, I had to have a hysterectomy (sp) at the age of 29, I am now 44. I am trying so hard to understand that my old life is gone and I now have a new life. I was also diagnosed with BP 1 after being treated with depression and generalized axiety disorder for over 25 years. I also had several TIA strokes in June of 2006. So being a Personality type a and now having to change my life style totally has been hard. I work really hard with my shrink, therapist, GP and pain management doc every month. Take my mix of cocktails as prescribed but do not see alot of changes. The pain management doc even started me on TPI. I have only had those done the last three months and have not given up but do not see much relief from those. Last month he missed a trigger point, which I know is a risk we take, but boy was that horrible.

I filed for SSD but have been denied in the first two stages. So am waiting for a date for a hearing with the judge. Hopefully and I pray to God that I will be able to win at that level. I really don't know how SS can even think someone would hire me with the cocktail of meds I take. Technically, I could probably be arrested if pulled while driving on the mix I have to take during the day. I try to stay upbeat. The financial burden though really is starting to make me feel worthless and a burden to my family. I have always worked and always been very independent. My husband and I have only been married for less than 2 years and he totally refuses to let me go back to work, I feel like sometimes I should just go and do it. I know I would never last, but I feel so trapped in this house day after day even though I hurt so bad.

Sorry for the rambling and being so down. I am just having a bad couple of weeks and needed to vent.

God Bless to all who had the patience to listen

[photoangel71]

Jenn4508, don't give up, I am 36 years old and I received my disability FINALLY, last March 2007. I really believe they have it set up, where they make you wait 2 yrs, to try and break you down and starve you out. I lived off of 350dollars a month while I waited for mine. I became disabled in 2002 for my back, but they also added major depression and Adult ADD and other things after all my medical records, were received. I was turned down after the first 5 or 6 months of filing, but I waited until 2005 to file hoping that my two back surguries would work, ended up going to pain clinic which at first I thought was a God send, only to discover you build up a tolorance after a few years on that, so nothing was helping. In the meantime my husband abandoned me and my son, and I no longer had insurance so no meds. I had a hysterectomy when I was 27, but because I had fybrocystic disease (or whatever they called it) in my breast I could not take hormones. I began to feel as if I could take no more, I struggled to get my son to school (he had been thru too much with his father abandoning us, this being his adopted father, his biological father gave his rights up years before, so I didn't want to change his school). They don't have "housing based on income" in the area he goes to school, because it is so small. I lived with depression and anxiety disorder, and adult ADD along with severe pain,facet arthrius, degenerative disk disease, myofasical disorder, and had no meds and no insurance. After I went to court, I received my medical records from the lawyers. I was shocked to discover that even the doctors that disability had made me go to had also claimed they believed I was unable to work in my condition, Yet I had still been denied. I used every available resource to get me by and my bills paid, and had to just wait. Finally after I go before the judge, (and them loosing my paper work, me calling the lawyer to find out what was taking so long with an answer, I discovered I could call social security and get the judges secretary, and then thats when they discovered they had "misplaced" my papers, in other words, forgot me, but within two weeks I have my answer that I was found disabled. I still don't understand why I had to have the lawyer, he did nothing in court I answered all the questions, he did nothing when I had not received my answer in a timely manner (over a month), but I do know that others have been trying for years and they never get theirs until they hirer a lawyer, who does nothing but get your records and fill out paperwork you could do yourself, and then get a huge chunk of your backpay. I was to the point that I wanted to just kill myself, but I had to be strong for my son. Keep at them, keep calling, keep fighting, don't give up, thats what they want, and in your condition you are disabled and if you ever worked in your life that is YOUR money YOU paid in, for this very reason! Fight for it!

[Jenn4508]

photoangel71 - Thank you for your kind post.... I know that SS wants you to give up but I will not. I think it is sad that I have worked my whole life and many hours a day when I did work and then am no longer able to and I have to wait around until SS has time to schedule me in to see the Judge due to a hiring freeze.

I feel like I am stuck in a marriage of two years and I feel there is no way out at this point. I stay due to the insurance and await my day in court. He comes home everynight from work and drinks until he passes out. I left my first husband for this same reason and he knows it. Does this man not think I have enough stress in my life. I am sorry to vent, just not real happy right now and I have no one to really talk to that understands other than these boards.

I will keep fighting for the SS and hopefully then my husband will understand if and when I get it that its give up the drinking or I have a way out.

Thanks to all who listened to the rambling, the fibro fog is playing games today and hard to stay on track. Happy New Years to all. Jenn

[Jenn4508]

Originally Posted by magnolialady

Even though I am "bone-tired" I felt I needed to post my unique experience with Adderall, prescribed for the same exact reasons, fatigue and brain fog. Diagnosed 15 years ago with Fibro, it overtook me 3 years ago, taking a healthy active creative person down to wishing I would just die. Never suicidal because there is always hope, but just plain miserable. I sought help from my pcp for 2 years trying every antidepressant the drug companies are pushing right now and none worked. He finally gave up on me and referred me to a psychiatrist. On my first visit I told him all I want is some energy to get me back on my feet and I will work myself back to where I want to be. He started me on Adderall regular the same as your doc. I went back for a followup and told him I might as well be eating candy. He upped me to 40 mg. a day too, and when I went to see him 15 days later I was totally amazed at what I had discovered. I had been "waiting" for all this energy to hit me so I could speed through my dirty house and finally see some results from taking a pill. It Never Happened. What did happen was a wonderful lifting of the depression, ceased the crying spells immediately and allowed my brain to say..."you've got to help yourself". I forced myself to start walking again on my treadmill and after a week you would have thought I had conquered the world. Now, with my doctor's okay, I space out the time between pills and the amount. I can't take a "holiday" as the depression comes bouncing back the next day, and if I have to live on Adderall for the rest of my life hey it's better than having no life at all. Geez I'm 56, I have to do what I have to do. I did discover that taking 20 mg. in the morning is better for me (I thought mornings were naturally my best time of the day) and then 5, 10, or 20 mg. by 2:00. This is the dose I change around. I did try provigil...I felt like a zombie stuck in mud too on that. I couldn't even lay down and rest, forget napping. My rheumy recently added Klonopin to help me sleep at night even though I told him I had been taking Xanax .5 mg. for 6years for that reason. OMG if Elvis felt like I did he is in a better place. Uppers (adderall) and downers (klonopin) only work for drug addicts or people taking it for reasons other than medical. I dropped the klonopin like a hot potatoe and 2 days later I was back to my normal self. After that experience I am satisfied with Xanax' 5 hours of sleep because when I get up in the morning it's out of my system. It's not fighting the Adderall. I have also, which no pill will do, started to accept my limitations as my new way of life and it's ok. Fibro brings on the worse kind of depression because it's not a chemical imbalance that a pill will improve, it's reality. Fibro will not leave you day or night, there is no pill that helps me with the pain and soreness and I struggle to sleep. I sure hope for the younger patients (like you) they find "something, anything"...to alleviate the fatigue first and I really think the other problems associated with fibro would improve naturally just from that. The medical field just doesn't get it because they can't prove on paper what is causing it. I had the trauma to the head theory, being involved in an accident when I was young, head cracking the windshield. Who knows? Who cares...just find us some relief. Didn't mean to go on and on, it's just my heart breaks when I read posts from young women starting on the same road that I've been down. I wish my mother were alive so I could tell her...mama you were right about experience being the best teacher. Now I tell my children that and I see that "same look" I had. Oh well. Take care and please don't hesitate to ask any questions I didn't answer in this loooong post. And please don't give up, just try to start accepting now the changes that Fibro demands (until they find a cure?), because when you add menopause on top of Fibro....you need to be ready for anything.

You are very wise. I have accepted the hand I have been dealt however it doesn't mean I have to like it. I guess what really bothers me the most are all the drugs I am on and it seems that none really help what they are supposed to help. I keep trying though and hopefully one day, just maybe, they will get it right. Thank you for your kind words. Jenn