desperately need to get off methadone

sid444 · 05-31-2002, 12:03 AM

I have been doing alot of reading today on this site. I am so amazed that there are so many people out there just like me...and I'm truely grateful. I have been on methadone for almost a year now. I got on it to stop taking pills, which stopped working and led me to heroin. I have had two back surgeries, I have O/A, R/A , Fibromyalgia, Periformis Syndrom, I suffer with terrible migranes, and anxiety and panic attact's are the norm.I have only taken Vioxx for the Arthritis, and am on 220 mgs. of methadone for the constant chronic pain I'm in. Oh, I am presently being tested for lupus, and MS,( which runs in my family). I feel like there isn't anything that I don't have. (I have Hep C also) I bet you're saying, " man, is this woman for real"?)I am very real, and in tremendous pain all the time. I have an 11 year old daughter, God bless her, for all she knows is that her Mum is sick too much to be able to do a whole lot with her, but, I do my dambdest to make sure that she knows how much I love her, I help her with her homework, and besides going to the library whenever we can, I honestly do try to play basketball, or soccer,or do other things that she likes, I can't skateboard because of the balancing though.HA! I do have a good outlook on life, live and love to travel, but this methadone has really put my life on hold. I've gained @ 45lbs.and lately it even feels like the done isn't working for me now either. My Dr. at the clinic that I go to doesn't seem to want me to come off of it. I am doing everything in my power to try to stop though, and he still gives me a hard time. I don't know what to do. I feel like I just wrote my life story, thanks for reading this, and if you have any advice at all, please let me know. I'll be forever grateful.I will be 10 months clean on the 31st., so this is what I've decided to do, tell people a little bit (HA HA HA)about me, so, thanks again for taking the time to read this. Sid444

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sid444 · 05-31-2002, 11:20 AM

Could somebody please tell me if they have heard about the methadone clinics getting cut off from Mass Health, if this should happen, there are going to be alot of sick people out there. Thanks Sid444

salem652 · 05-31-2002, 11:28 AM

Sidd,it sounds to me like you have a good grip on life,but this methadone is really bringing you down,I could hear by reading your letter the depressed sound of when it comes to doing things with your child. I believe that anything is possible,if you want it bad enough...Pain is a major part of life,And it hurts like hell.If you want something bad enough,go for it.From the sound of it,,i do not think you could feel any worse.And a major part of your recovery is having a support system,,everyone needs that,Even non-addicts.If you do not have a good support system you really need to get one.
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sid444 · 05-31-2002, 12:04 PM

Thank you for taking the time to write to me Salem, I really appriciate it. I do have a wonderful support system, it's just that they all live in other Cities, or other States, and we have a hard time getting together...anyway, thanks again for your help.Sid444.

p.s.It seems we are from the same town, Gardner,MA.
how about that...it's a small world for real.lol, I hope to hear from you again sometime.