Chefob...

[stayhomemom]

Hi Chef...I love reading your posts because you're so honest and real. You are honest about your addiction and struggle for recovery. I hope that you are successful in achieving your goal. I also like reading your posts because you said you worked in Daytona. I'm originally from Ormond Beach and often wonder if the ob after chef stands for that....

I love the Ormond Beach / Daytona area and miss it very much. My life was much more sane when I was living near the beach. That was a salvation for me. I would go to the beach at least 4 days a week. Even if it was just for a walk during sunset....now that I'm in Houston I'm a little more land locked and yearn for the water....

I'm struggling in my taper but am definitely taking much less than I was even a month ago. I'm down to about 60 mgs of hydro a day and am no longer swigging cough meds w/the pills. I used to drink Atuss, Tussionex, whatever I could get from the doctor...

I have 2 kids and I want to get off these so their lives aren't a complete fog for me. I'm tired of revolving my activities around when and how and how many pills to take. I would even take them before going to the grocery store because I felt like it would make it better....whatever that means.

Anyway...I really enjoy your posts. I hope you are doing well. I can only imagine being in pain and having to do the work you do. I wish you well....shm.

[spark-o-cet]

hey KEVIN how goes it today.me this is my fourth day of no opiates and it feels good.now comes the hard part of maintaining-spark

[rosietee]

shm, I know exactly what you mean about taking them before I go to the grocery store with the kids. I'm glad you are taking less. I'm not down to where you are yet, but I am taking less than I was, too.

spark, I caught on to the KEVIN reference too, lol. CONGRATULATIONS to you on your success. Thanks for the inspiration. Every time I read a post like that from you or Michelle it just helps me go another hour without taking the pills. That's how I'm doing it at this point, hour to hour of not grabbing a handful and downing them.

rose

[chefob1]

okay...whats the kevin reference?...yeah,thats me....its supposed to be annonymity is the secret to success,but im me.....stayhomemom,ill fill ya in later,my daughters on the phone....shes important,doesnt live w/me ...shes 9......

[chefob1]

ok im back...so anyways whats with the kevin thing...spark,please let me know...4 days eah...thatll work dude,and now your right,just be tough and make us proud..heck,since weve been on the board no one has stayed sober....someday has to do it,make us all proud.....i still say the toughest part is dealing with the w/d's...you feel like dying,even though we are not going to.....a couple months ago my partner told me..you havent died yet and you dont need to go to the e.r.(for w/d's)and she was right...but then i had to go to the er last sat cause my back was killin me and i told them it wasnt for opiates,that i had a doc who would write me a script if i needed...they gave me twopills and said i needed to hook up with a orthopedic to order me a m.r.i....i see me regular doc every week sometimes a couple times or email him...i bring him and his family grub from the cafe..its good to have a doc who is a recovering addict..we also hook up every week at a/a...stayhomemom...i havent been called kevin in years,they always call me chefob cause of my last name and ive been cookin for 30 years...moved to flagler in 1987 and lived in port orange for 11 years of marriage..was executive chef at indigo hilton/sugarmill c.c./pelican bay c.c.....last job before buying this cafe on sr 40 was opened 8 million dollar country club...me and girl/friend got this place two/half yrs ago...close to my kids,9 and 12....addiction cost me marriage/all material goods/built brand new home in Sanctuary next to flyin where john travolta lives/mark martin/nascar guys...300,000 home i lived in for one week before wife divorced me...kinda jumped the gun,no chance for recon now,both are sorry for that...i hurt my reputation to folks in my business i know...they know im talented chef but got addicted to drugs cause of my injury...ran over by a golf cart at indigo going into work one day in 1990....then in 1999 it was cheaper to purchase heroin than get the opiate pills...that really screwed me...i got off that crap cause two guys shot my dealer for his stuff...i never would have touched that stuff but narcotics make you do things you wish you hadnt....anyways then i used to drive south to a clinic for a monthly script of bupenorphine to get off the h and pills...that cost me financially and everything else..if i didnt hurt my back years ago i wonder what life would be like today...i love my kids...anyways life goes on and i gotta close the kitchen so i can get out of here,....been here since 6am.....will talk more....chef