Perhaps this is the best place to seek out helpful information.

[Karebear2u]

I have an a friend named Billy whom is about 47 years old.

My friend Billy is a caregiver whom lives and cares for his Father whom has had MS for over 30 years now.

Billy explains that he's cared for his Father for so long that back in Middle School days when kids were leaving School to go for lunches he was rushing home to care for his Father,make meals that kind of thing.

Over the last 11-12 years I've known Billy he has had his own 'carpet/ulpostry (sp) business from home and thats how he's supported himself. His father is on a disability pension just to give you a bit of information of how long I've known him/them.

My point is almost 2 weeks ago Billy's Father had a really bad bout' to the point Billy had to rush him into Emergency where things were touch and go for about 2 days--He was in for over a week ... Billy's father has deteriated to the point it takes him 10 minutes to get a kleenix to his nose to blow it ... and so Billy is in 'constant need' ... His father is restricted to a wheelchair but since getting out of the hospital last week Billy's father can no longer shuffle himself to help Billy with his dressing/pottying & the like -- just those kind of things.

Leaving the apartment is now a nightmare and has to be short bits of time because he's worried his Dad needs him. Billy's Father can't even answer the phone any longer.

So I asked Billy did he have anything like Meals on Wheels coming in for his Father to make that one chore easier on him. Billy's reply was "No my Father had it all arranged once, tried it and then refused to eat the food insisting Billy instead cook for them".

So my whole point is things are becoming increasingly difficult in managing this all. In fact upon hearing how Billy's fathers condition has deterriated so bad I was surprised the Dr.'s allowed him to come home ... this time but Billy insists it was at his Fathers angry insistance that he go home "now" type thing.

So is there any avenues,agencies,resources available out there that can help Billy and his Father.

We reside in Toronto Ontario Canada and I would appreciate and promise to look into any available options/advise you throw my way and appreciate your help very much as I'd like to help my friend with this situation.

[SherryAnne]

I think a great place to start for help would be with a hospice service. I would think the father would certainly qualify as he has MS. Hospice can come into the home and help take care of the needs of terminally ill patients. They have aides for the everyday needs and also nurses to help
keep the patient comfortable. THere are also doctors on staff (that may even come to the home, if necessary.)

My Mom lived with me and my family and recently passed away from lung cancer. I was her primary caregiver. She had hospice services in the home (as that is where she wanted to die) every day except weekends. The doctors would also come to visit in an emergency.

I know what your friend is going through as a caregiver and I will pray for him and his dad. I really think hospice would be a blessing for both of them.