Cathy, I am so sorry you have lost your best friend-I never really felt the love I recieve from my pets or anything near from any person and I really do know how you feel. It is devastating and it leaves you so empty. I lost 2 precious dogs in my arms in the middle of the night. One a Boston Terrier had Cushings and woke me up in the middle of the night, I had time to pick her up and hold her and she had a heart attack-this dog taught me what love is all about, she was my girl. My other baby a male French Bulldog began having seizures at 6 years old-we went through a lot of traumatic nights and days before he had the worst seizure imaginable. I still have not got over that one yet and now I have 2 Bostons and 2 French Bulldogs-I know I set myself up but I will not be without. I love my babies so much and I feel your pain. I really do. One thing that made me feel better was feeling they knew I was with them till the end. Their love is unconditional and being there in the final moment is what true friendship is about.