Crying

NugIsHere · 02-10-2003, 08:18 PM

I've been through a lot in the past 4 years, I'm undiagnosised, I have constant pain 24/7, i've been to over 50 doctors, had 22 blood tests, 2 EMG tests, a bone scan and 6 MRIs, which have all come back negative. I've been on about 8 different meds since September, just to try and see if they'll do anything. None did. Last Tuesday, I started on Enbrel injections. The nurse did the first one, and she was going step by step how to do it and the next step was to take the cover off the needle, I just started to cry. Friday I had to do it on my own, it went pretty well. If this isnt hard enough, I'm 17. Ive been homeschooled since the middle of 9th grade because of this, and now I'm home taught. I just got a new teacher, after 3 months, they couldnt find me one. On Friday, I told my mom, it's just too hard to do school right now. I don't really know how to explain that, it's just, at 17, having to give yourself shots, and take pain meds through out the day just to have a normal day... school isn't exactly the first thing on my mind. My mom kept saying well maybe you could just try one class..Its just so hard to explain why i dont want to right now. I was suppose to graduate in June, but personally, it doesnt really matter to me, I know I will finish my senior year, but just cause its not right now, doesnt make a difference to me, I think my health or anyones, is more important than anything else. I cry a lot about this, usually at night, and no one else knows. I dont like to tell anyone cause everyone thinks im so strong, and they wouldnt understand. I know its ok to cry, especially with my reasons, its just i feel like if i cry, its showing weakness. I'm so hard on myself about this, and thats why I keep it all inside until it makes me cry. How could I make this easier on myself without having to cry secretly?

-Nug http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/dizzy.gif

Tree Frog · 02-10-2003, 08:39 PM

Hi NugIsHere,
I am wondering why the doctors are still considering the pain is physically caused, when all tests are negative? There are many emotions that can cause real, physical pain. I agree that you need a solution, more than pain meds, maybe more than school, right now.

What else in your life do you feel sad or negative about?

Have you had any thyroid testing?

NugIsHere · 02-10-2003, 09:02 PM

theres nothing else but pshyical pain, somedays ill wake up and not be able to walk.. they think it has something to do with nerves, but doctors dont know much about nerves. You could have something effect your body, do the damage and leave, and if you're tested for it, it comes back negative. No, Im the happiest kid youll ever meet, before i got sick my life was perfect. Youre post was kind of rude.. youre saying that just cause they cant find anything its beig made up? i was never said until i got the pain, and nothing else in my life is negative at all, and nothing else makes me sad. What do you mean i need a solution more than pain meds????

Tree Frog · 02-11-2003, 04:46 AM

Hi NugIsHere:
I didn't sugest that your pain is "made up". I would never think that.

People often think it is rude to suggest that they may have emotional pain. But emotional pain is very real, and can become real physical pain.

It is not rude to mention that physical pain can have an emotional source...it is just a fact. You asked for help with a problem that not even the doctors that examined you can find. I am just making suggestions, and if they don't apply to you, that is fine.

You didn't mention if your thyroid was tested. That is a physical issue. Many times thyroid imbalance is misdiagnosed. I had pain the doctors could not find the source of, too, and my thyroid problem was undiagnosed for a long time while docs said my thyroid was normal.

It wasn't.

[This message has been edited by Tree Frog (edited 02-11-2003).]

Trooper · 02-11-2003, 10:29 AM

Look into 'Fibromyalgia'.

I went through what you did at the age of 17 too, so I know how difficult this is for you.

I went through 12 years of testing - everything under the sun. Then I finally got the dx of Fibro.

Have you seen a Rheumatologist?

Good luck sweetie, hang in there, let me know what you think once you do a search. Also, there is a Fibro board here as well.

-Trooper (hence my name - trooper for dealing with the pain for 13+ years)