OMG!!! My heart goes out to you at the tragic and sudden loss of your friends. Your physical symptoms are very understandable, and having asthma can definitely be exacerbated by the distress you're experiencing at this time.
It will take time for you to sort out your feelings, and I don't think going to the gym would be the answer.
Overmedicating with the albuterol more than the recommended dosages will cause other physical symptoms and set you up for more problems.
Have you dealt yet with being in the accident? Have you yet dealt with the loss of your friends? Have you seen someone professional who can help you through this?
There is a process for grief. If you don't go through it, suppresssing feelings will come out in other ways.
There are medications such as Ativan which is an anti-anxiety that can help with some of the physical symptoms.
A very good long-time friend of mine died on New Years Eve of a sudden heart attack while snowmobiling. His death hit me hard and I cried for a week missing him and knowing I'll never see him again. I went with it, felt the raw feelings of grief and have dealt with much of my feelings through that.
I also have asthma, and can relate to the stress induced feelings you're having. I read in a book that not enough carbon dioxide in the lungs can cause that tightening feeling and some of the symptoms because of too much oxygen. When we are stressed, we take faster, shallow breaths that cause this loss of carbon dioxide.
At first I thought this was a load of crap and forgot about it until I experienced the tightening feelings in my throat and upper chest airway. I was in bed, thinking of all sorts of stuff and was just too lazy to get my inhaler. I thought about the breathing exercise and tried it.
Basically, it's holding the breath. I draw in a slow breath through my nose for a 5 count. Hold it for a 5 count and through pursed lips let it out for a 5 count. Do this a few times till you feel more relaxed. It works. Also, as you are having the physiological symptoms, I'm sure your mind is starting to have many different thoughts which can also exacerbate them. If you are focussed on the breathing, your mind will also relax.
Don't wait until you are in deeper asthma situation......DO IT IMMEDIATELY upon the first symptom.
Always have your meds with you anyway. But think, don't react. Most of us with asthma knows that the panic feelings make everything seem much worse.
I express to you my deepest sympathies in the tragic death of your fiends. May you have much support from your family, friends and loved ones. May your shared memories and experiences help you through your grief.
My very best to you,
quincy
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