Hydro's are getting me.......

loverLife · 04-30-2004, 03:24 PM

I just read a post "How long does it take to become physically addicted?" I had a major surgery last year, and of course was put on hydro's. I had to take them for 6 weeks. I was physically addicted at that point, and I was able to taper off. I also suffer from headaches, (bad) and I take hydro's for those. I have seen myself going from being able to keep them in the cabinet, to now, not being able to keep them in the cabinet for when I really need them. I get a script, and take them all until gone. (not presribed that much), but I have seen myself get "psychologically" addicted to them. They are like and anti-depressant for me and give me lots of energy, the world is a happy place when I am on them. Even though I know the consequences of the physical withdraws, I still can't stop taking them! They are like the Devil....a little voice that says, take them, take them! I have an addictive personality, and have no problem with any other drug. (used too). But when I ran across these little suckers......bad news. Over the course of the past year, I see myself getting hooked. I go on "binges", I am now on a 3 week binge, and now afraid of the withdrawls. I work F/T and know I will need at least 3 days.

I think I am at the point to come clean, doing this on this board is my first step, my second, is to stop taking them, and probably get to N/A meetings. Does anyone else seem to start having withdrawl syptoms when you know you only have about 4 pills left???? Is that physcological as ****** or what!
I only take about 7-8 5 mg a day, and sometimes 4 10mgs a day, as I have read on this board, that is where it starts.....I am amazed at how many some people take, but I am sure I will be there if I don't do someting about it now.
Thanks for letting me ramble.......

no patience · 04-30-2004, 05:57 PM

my w/ds were definitly worse when i knew my methadone was low i know what you're saying in that area thats why i think physical dependance is a crock it's awesome that you want to stop just make sure you're ready it takes a very positive attitude to do it but i'm really happy that you recognize you're problem and do something about it and joining the boards is definitly a step in the right direction and welcome to the boards we'll be here through it all hugs kelleigh

loverLife · 05-03-2004, 07:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by no patience

my w/ds were definitly worse when i knew my methadone was low i know what you're saying in that area thats why i think physical dependance is a crock it's awesome that you want to stop just make sure you're ready it takes a very positive attitude to do it but i'm really happy that you recognize you're problem and do something about it and joining the boards is definitly a step in the right direction and welcome to the boards we'll be here through it all hugs kelleigh

Thanks so much for responding - you were the only one and I appreciate it! I have already starting tapering this week. My binge will be one month on Wed.

no patience · 05-03-2004, 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by loverLife

Thanks so much for responding - you were the only one and I appreciate it! I have already starting tapering this week. My binge will be one month on Wed.

hey know problem good luck on the tapering i'm here if you need any thing like someone to talk to cause let me tell you talking about it one of the best ways to get through this ordeal i talked my family to death and hang in there i'll be rooting for ya and i'll be here every step of the way ok hugs kelleigh

Twinlynn · 05-03-2004, 10:25 PM

Welcome to the Board, Christine! :-)

I read your story just now. And I want to reassure you that there is a wealth of personal information on this Board, to help you physicaly--and psychologically--to get through this. Although I have managed to taper greatly--I have still not taken that final step--so I really do understand your plight. (I'm at the same amount as you.) And I did hesitate to answer you because, soon, you will be hearing from the many posters who HAVE taken that step--and who want to share the specifics of their success and just how they did it....wWhereas I am still standing at the end of the "diving board"--not quite yet ready to face the plunge! But--with the help and encouragement of so many Board members--I have, at least made the climb to the top rung! :-) And, they will help you, too. In fact, the combination of their wisdom--and your determination--will get you there.

I don't want to be an "enabler" or add to any fears you may have about stopping the hydro, when I have not yet done more than just taper. But, I do want to say that, at the 'lowish' level at which you have been taking the drug....I think you can do this!

With only a few pills left, though, tapering is not really an option for you. Are you still getting the pills prescribed? How often? Does your doctor have any "suspicions" that you are addicted? If you ARE still get the Rx...then you can taper...and several Board member here will have good information. (If you do not hear from others soon, just "bump" this Post back up to the top, tomorrow.)

In the meantime....try to find and read as many of the older Posts as you can. There are numerous Posts that allude to exactly the same sort of strugle that you are facing.

I, too (even though I now know all the facts), find it tough not to see this drug as an instant, though very short-acting "anti-depressant"!! (And I take real antidepressants that have been life saving for me.) But that instant "energy", temporary motivation..and sudden (short) view of the world as a "happier place"--is such a conflicting struggle for me. And, like you, I have never increased my dose much, because 1.) I do not have the access to the pills, and 2) my system has never beenable to handle more than one tablet at a time...or anywhere near the level that most people can go up to. But--I don't want you to just limit yourself to a taper, when I feel certain you can go for the big 'schmear' (the 'whole deal')--as we say in New York!! :-) So--again--read the older posts..and listen to the wisdom of those who have managed to win this battle! This is a very kind, compassionate group of people, who will offer you a range of advice--from gentle hints...to boot camp tough!! LOL!! And we will all be cheering you on through both your wins...and any occasional slip-ups!!!

I'm going off-line now...but will follow your posts and see how you are doing. I agree that you will need at least three days to get started physically...and emotionally. Try to do what you can to get as much time off as possible, so that you can relax at home and do whatever you feel helps you the most.

Lots and lots of good wishes to you now and along way. Keep us posted! Lynn :-)