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Old 08-19-2001, 01:31 PM   #1
JanieB
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: England
Posts: 48
Post Mum has Passed Over ....

Dear Friends at Healthboards,
My mum passed over on Sunday 29th July, she was in the hospice and had a minor stroke, which meant she went into a coma and passed in her sleep....She went to sleep and never woke up....I am devastated, I have lost my best friend..My Mum, but I am in a way grateful she went in her sleep...She was in so much pain and she had lost the use of her legs due to the cancer spreading to the spine.. My memory is on the Friday I took her in her wheelchair to the hospice garden pond, it was warm and sunny and she had iced lemonade, we laughed and joked and enjoyed the sunshine, she told me how much she loved me ...and my hubby and daughter, those are my last memories of Mum..
I saw her straight after she had died and she looked so peaceful just asleep...The hospice rang me in the early hours of the morning to say Mum had deteriorated quickly, but she died before I got there....even though we rushed she was dead in a few minutes....
My mum is now at peace...I want to thank everybody that replied with advice and help...You are a good bunch...With loads of Love Janie xoxooxoxox
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Old 08-20-2001, 01:33 AM   #2
Lori
Inactive
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 266
Unhappy

Dear Janie,
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss
What a sweet memory of your Mother.
Deepest sympathy,
Lori
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Old 08-20-2001, 02:07 AM   #3
Luvcarosel
Inactive
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Dale city Va
Posts: 36
Post

Iam so sorry to hear of the loss of your mom. I also
experienced this pain May 5,2001. My grandma was like a mother to me we were very close. Her death was unexpected. she had been mis-diagnosed as having emphazema 2 yrs ago and than to find out april 22 after having been in the hospital for 2 wks while in ICU that her lungs had fluid and they needed to do a fine needle aspiration. They detected adenio carcinoma
of the right lung an said she could survive with the
lung cancer she had because it had not spread toany other part of her body. It was contained to the right lung only. I was preparing to bring her home she had
2 doses of chemo and we were told she was terminally
ill and she would need care. I had discussed this w/ grandma and she agreed to come home with me. We were
in the process of setting up hospice that week and she died 3 days later. I was so devastated and still am. I
am so depressed and lonely. I shared my most deepest
thoughts with her. I feel like I have lost my best friend. Iam still in shock. It's like shes on vacation and iam waiting for her to call me when she gets home.
I would love to chat w/you I know your pain..
you can e-mail me at Luvcarosel@aol.com I would love to talk to someone who knows how I feel. My deepest sympathy to you , Lisa
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Old 08-24-2001, 08:52 AM   #4
rosalita100us
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Posts: 58
Post

My mother passed from lung cancer about a year ago. Like you she was my best freind. Greif is a process you just have to go through this is what I find will happen. First you cry every day,s everal times a day, then every other day, a couple of times a week and so on on ce amonth. Pretty soon you think your greif is under control and something little will set you back. Like the last thing for me was my dad sent me a bithday check and her name wasn't on the checks.You just have to flow with it and do whatever your body tells you you need to do, and don't ever let anyone tell you you should get on with your life. They were our mothers for god sakes. One thing I found that helped me when you are slightly better(for me it was 6 months into it) was I found the vcr tapes, some long ones on her talking, joking and being herself(not sick with cancer) when i am lonely for her i watch them. They can't compare to looking at a picture.Just keep yourself going and cry whenever and how often you need to cry.
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Old 09-01-2001, 05:04 AM   #5
Cancerpatientwife
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Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Arvada, CO USA
Posts: 5
Post

I was very sorry to hear about your Mum. My husband has almost the same diagnosis. Large cell carcinoma of right lung with near obstruction to the vena cava. I couldn't believe when I read your post! We have been seeking alternative treatments since his oncologist gave up on him. He basically told him to go home and enjoy the time he has left with me. This was because the cancer had started to spread to the liver and bones. Again, I am amazed that your Mum had exactly the same condition. I can't imagine losing my mother, or my husband for that matter. I must tell you that through this experience our love for each other has reached a new level. His courage gives me strength and he would say that my strength gives him courage. We are looking at all alternatives: nutrition, vitamins, herbs, heat and ozone therapy, and we have seen some improvement. I only found this site tonight. Please accept my sorrow & remorse about your Mum. This is the most frightening experience I've ever gone through, I can only imagine how you must be feeling. Please feel free to write me. I know you must be in a lot of pain. Time heals.

Diane
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