Vicodin W/D & Addiction. HELP

[alice06]

My problem first started when i gave birth to my son 9 months ago. I had some health issues after his birth, and ended up being a bad case of gallstones and turning into something alot more serious like pancreatitis. Point is i was in the hospital for a month, and super hooked on demerol. i would ask for it every 3 hours. knowing i had to wait 4. But my pain was so imaginable that i couldnt bare the thought of having to go through it. So after leaving the hospital, i had some moderate pain when i would eat , so they put in a feeding tube (which really , REALLY, sucked) and lessened the pain. They prescribed me the usual. Vicodin 5/500. and i slowly but surely started feeling its effects. and i got really hooked. So i went from taking maybe 3 or 4 , to taking 6-7 a day , i kept going in and out of e.r's JUST for the painkillers. In my mind i knew i had a problem, simply because my pain wasnt THAT bad. and i knew a tylenol or advil would help but i just couldnt stop. So i went to a G/I doc for my gallbladder removal and she refused to give me any type of narcotic. I left a little furious because i knew she saw right through my lies. So she refered me to another g/i doc and once again complained to him about my so called "pain" , so he gave in and prescribed me 60 + 1 refill , 10/500 tabs. which was double the dosage as before. It was pretty sad that a bottle of pills could make me so happy. When in reality it was my biggest downfall. I never saw it coming. I tried going cold turkey for a week. But ended up faking another pain for some more vicodin.

I see now that it has taken an effect on my personal life. i would take them secretly, count them to see if i had enough for the week, constantly think about what time i would take them, and stress and cry if i see i would be running out. Most normal 20 year olds go out have fun with friends , go to college , and work a average job. I had nothing, I would just stay home and make excuses not to go out just to take more pills. I hated myself and i hated how i felt.

Im on my 4th day with NO vicodin. I feel like complete crap. I had been taken the 10mg 3 times a day for about 6 months. So im wondering whats next? What can i do to get at least ONE NIGHT of good sleep, My legs for some reason are really sore and i feel like a ghost just mopeing around the house. Its not as bad as i thought it was, but i just cant seem to cheer up? What can i expect for the next following weeks/months? I just want to MOVE on with my life and not let this ugly addiction ruin my life & family.

Any suggestions on eating habits? or what worked best for w/d symptoms and NO sleep? any advice, stories, or help, would be of tremendous help.
Its good to feel im not alone anymore.
God bless