Rekabs,
I can sympathize with your feeling down...it is rather a roll of the dice, isn't it?
Am wondering how many meds they have you on and in what order you were put on each? Have you thought of taking one away at a time and trying different combinations to see if you could do without some and get better control with fewer meds? Or, could you restructure your life for awhile to pack in a lot of time for sleep...maybe you have deprived yourself for too long of periods without sleep and have not caught up sufficiently to keep the seizures controlable. I am not sure that total control of seizures, which would be ideal, is necessarily the answer as too many meds can make you feel like a zombie...we are talking about finding the best quality of life here.
Good luck. Keep the message board informed of your progress. God Bless.
Beth's Mom