Addiction Help

[timothynight]

This is the first time for me writing and very difficult. I've developed a strong addiction to Vicodin to deal with my depression & anxiety. I'm a 36 year old male with a wife, 3 year old son and 2 very successful businesses that I own with over 100 employees. I should be proud of what I've accomplished but for some reason I'm not. If anyone would find out about this it would devastate them and business relationships. I need to be a constant figure of leadership & strength. This takes a toll mentally and physically. I've tried various forms of antidepressants and they did nothing but make me feel more depressed and tired. I started using Vicodin after a surgery and found them to be exactly what I was looking for. It did wonders for my depression. I've been using off and on for over 4 years and know that I need to stop. Every time I've tried to stop (usually a week or 2) the antidepressants did nothing and eventually went back to Vicodin to feel good again. I don't know where to turn. I've been prescribed xanax, lorazapam, etc. as well but had to stop all within a few days because they caused very bad vision issues even in its lowest doses. Where do I turn?

[TJinPA]

Hi Tim
I could have written what you wrote. Unfortunatly you have an addiction. You need to face this head on and hold yourself accountable. You have the resources so you should see an addictionologist and let the truth flow. There is no easy way out of vicodan hell. I do not know how much you are taking but you need to know that there is no limit. Those little white lies can have you go from 0 to 30 in days. You have started in the right place by comming here. You will receive all the support you need. but you must take action.
In His Royal Service
TJ

[mariogreymist]

Well Tim, admitting you have a problem is the first necessary step. The next is doing something about it. I would suggest talking to your Dr about it, making sure he understands that the Vics are a problem for you. Whether you are on enough to require a medical de-tox or if he'll just refer you to an outpatient therapy I can't know. In the end, you'll need to admit this problem in person to someone, be it an NA meeting, a chemical dependency councilor or to a dr. Brace yourself for that - it can be humbling. Remember - there is nothing that says we can't be both successful and humble.

Good luck, and know that others have kicked opiates - you can too!

[icehouse3z]

im in the same boat you are, how many are you taking a day, have you tried to taper, keep us posted

[timothynight]

I've been going through about 60-90 Vicodin ES per month. Mostly in the evening to wind down from 12 hr. work days. I've quit cold turkey and been without for 2 days now and I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin. I was given Doxepin for the last few months as an antidepressant but it doesn't work at all. If anything it makes me feel worse with more fatigue. I want to try something else but not sure what will help. I've tried zoloft before but had a bad reaction to it.