Misdiagnosed ADD???????????

[phinia23]

My friend has two kids who are currently on medicine to treat them for ADD and ADHD. I think that their behavior problems are a result of bad parenting, not ADD. How are you supposed to know the difference? She and I argue over this a lot. I just hate to see them all drugged up. Why dont the parents take some responsibility and try to change the problem within the child before they resort to meds? Their has to be other alternatives to heal a childs spirit instead of breaking it with medication. Does anyone know of any great breakthroughs in the way of healing the children instead of offering them medicine?

[aurora.sunrise]

Hi phinea.. do not be so quick to judge your friend and her kids. Until you have actually lived with a child with ADD/ADHD you have NO idea what it is like. No parent wants to receive that diagnosis from the doctor and I know of none that would not rather have a child that does not need meds to cope with the world.

You voice a common misconception:

"Why dont the parents take some responsibility and try to change the problem within the child before they resort to meds? Their has to be other alternatives to heal a childs spirit instead of breaking it with medication. "

ADD and ADHD are not problems in the child's spirit. They are the result of a problem in the brain of the child that make it impossible for the child to filter out extraneous stimuli and focus on one thing (for decades ADD/ADHD was referred to by the medical community as minimal brain damage). Think of a radio where all the stations are broadcasting at the same time. That raucous "noise" is what the ADD/ADHD child deals with all of the time. Imagine how hard it would be for you to deal with that?! No wonder they get tense and frustrated and act out. No matter how much your friend tries, or how good her parenting skills, she cannot fix this for her kids.

The meds can be a very effective tool in helping the child and the family as a whole. What your friend needs right now is your support and caring, not you undermining the decision that she and the doctors have made. At the very least she does not need you adding to the stressors she is already having to deal with right now.

[janewhite1]

Number one, if you talk to her about it, don't put it that way! Saying she's a bad parent isn't going to get you far.

Now, the real issue. Whether meds are appropriate for her children or not is not something a stranger could tell you. What I do know is that they need to be used together with various behavioral and educational techniques to help the kids figure things out. Also, they need to be administered under the supervision of a physician. If the kids are, you think, really in trouble, ie not eating or sleeping due to too much medication, or in some other form of imminent danger, then it might be appropriate to say something.

But, ultimately, they are her children. You can help as much as she will let you, but you can't raise them for her.

[ECALEXANDER]

Originally Posted by phinia23

My friend has two kids who are currently on medicine to treat them for ADD and ADHD. I think that their behavior problems are a result of bad parenting, not ADD.

How are you supposed to know the difference?

If they can (non-doped) play a video game or do some other activity they enjoy for 30 mins without flinching, they dont have ADD, ADHD, or XYZLMNOP.


Remember that kids with ADHD have "problem in the brain of the child that make it impossible for the child to filter out extraneous stimuli and focus on one thing"

So by that definition video games and cartoons would be no different than school or homework.

[index.html]

Originally Posted by ECALEXANDER

If they can (non-doped) play a video game or do some other activity they enjoy for 30 mins without flinching, they dont have ADD, ADHD, or XYZLMNOP...

Actually, that's not true and it's a common misconception. Because video games and tv are so stimulating, many kids with ADD can play with them for hours on end.

Ecalexander - do you have ADD? Are you needing more information about it?