Hi UG,
I'm sorry you're feeling so panicked about this. I'm not the best informed person about pregnancy, but I can relay some of what I've read from reliable sources. Yes, there is some risk when someone with genital herpes has children, but it's far from terrible. You don't say but I'm assuming it's genital herpes you have (whether it be HSV-1 or HSV-2).
The chances of it being transmitted during pregnancy or childbirth is by far the worst when the mother contracts herpes while she is pregnant, which apparently won't be the case for you. And overall there is only a 1 in 2000 chance that a baby will contract herpes from the mother (in the US, lower in other countries).
There are certainly precautions that can and should be taken. It is now considered safe for a woman to take antiviral drugs while pregnant to reduce the chances of an OB during childbirth, for instance. And if your partner has herpes there may be adjustments you'll have to make regarding sexual contact during pregnancy.
I think it would be helpful to find out what type(s) you have, so you know your facts. If you have HSV-1 (as most of the population does in the form of cold sores) but not HSV-2, you'll need to make sure you don't come in contact with HSV-2 during pregnancy.
Next time you get an outbreak, get the doctor to do a swab culture within the first 24 hours. That will tell you for sure which type it is. If the test keeps coming back with a false negative result (which it often will) then get a blood test done (more expensive) but make sure it's a test that distinguishes between types.
You might want to check out a book called "The Truth About Herpes" by Dr. Stephen Sacks, which is an excellent resource for information.
There are others here on the Board who have more extensive information about pregnancy with herpes, so maybe they can fill in any gaps or correct any misinformation I might have.
Good luck!
TheOneInFour