Misery and Suicide

[Sahuja]

Hi,
Two days ago I got back from the psychiatric ward where I was for 4 days... I overdosed on medication. You would never imagine it coming from me...Am bubbly (on the outside), attractive, in law school, 24 and just got married 6 months ago... But I am miserable. My disfunctional parents have driven me to this point...My mother constantly lays her depressions on me and is completely dependant on me... She doesnt like my husband, because he has taken me away per se...She is a control freak...I cant even express the pain I have... I feel like I am living a dream, or should I say nightmare... I mean, I have a great husband who i Love. I just dont feel like this is the life I was supposed to live... It just wasnt...My mom says she realized a lot now (because of my little attempt) and will change. I dont trust that. I guess I dont want her moods governing mine... I dont know... I just need to get far away... I am starting therapy next week. I just feel so trapped into this box called my life... I dont know what to do. ANd what frightens me is the fact that physical pain doesnt bother me. I had no care of the consequences of the overdose, nor was I in any poain or uncomfort when they were making me drink charcoal. Nor was I even afraid when they said my liver may have been damaged so they needed to check...Nothing... I am feeling like I am a zombie walking around life. Someone help.

[Darrens girl]

Heyyy, I can really relate to you. My parents have driven me too the edge also where I don't want to live any more and I act ''normal'' and ''happy'' all of the time to hide everything.Its amazing how much physical pain one can take to make the emotional pain go away. I hope you feel at least a little better soon.
Darrens girl

[snowbug]

{{{{you}}}}
Try to think of some ways you can get a bit of emotional distance from your mother. She sounds unhealthy to be around. At 24 and newly married if you want to have more privacy (and not have your marriage tank within the year due to her interference), you need a game plan so that you can be in control of your life. Hopefully your therapist will be able to help you work on this.

Mom sounds like she could use some therapy of her own, but you are not responsible for everything she does and solving every little gripe she has. That's your dad's job, LOL!

In the meantime, if you don't screen your phone calls I would do so. There is no law that says that you have to pick up the phone or answer the front door just because it's your mother! She may be mad when she sees you are trying to get some distance from her, but to have your sanity will be worth it. Good luck and please post again so we know how things are going.

[canadian_Sweetie]

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