PTSD & Depression

[Adultchile]

I'm having a bad relapse of depression and PTSD - for a year or so, I had things under control enough to work and have a life, but since 9/11, I've been on a downhill slope, finally going back on Zoloft a couple weeks ago. Does it ever end?

[chrysanthemum]

Hi Adultchile,

Tragedies like the incident on the 11th. of September last year, deeply affect people.

Due to its intensity, it re-awakened old wounds for many people: yourself included, it seems.

Yes,things can and will get better. are you having counseling for the PTSD? If not, I would strongly urge you to. Medication will be very helpful to you, but so will the sense of closure you obviously need.

I do hope that things start to improve quickly for you, and feel free to post here for advice and support.

Best wishes,
Chrys.

[booger_dee]

Originally posted by Adultchile:
Does it ever end?

Probably not. I've been dealing with it for over 30 years. Since Vietnam. And it wasn't entirely the killing and the deaths of my friends that provoked it. That just seemed to somehow get in the middle of a lifetime of events that created the condition. I guess in a way I was born with it. On Sep 11 2001 I was a work 5 miles south of the Pentagon. I watched the Pentagon burn. It wasn't till the next day that I found out that the ODCSOPS, our command HQ, took part of the hit. I knew some of those people. What goes around comes around.

But antidepressants and the like are so disabling themselves. Their method of action is to turn off certain areas of the mind. And counseling is BS for me. I just stay 'high'. Caffeine, ephedrine, and Ritalin. It's like a balancing act to keep the receptors from burning out though. And when the day comes that I can no longer sustain it, I'll just exit of my own accord. Besides that my body is getting real tired these days. It's getting time for the 'Big Sleep'.

[oldbetsy16]

Strange reading the notes in here. I can relate to what he was saying and I often feel the same way. Not frrom war, but from my father dying in a car accident when I was 11. See the irony? You're here now because of PTSD your father had, I'm here because of PTSD I have because of my father. I'm 32 now, and the ONLY reason I am is because every time I'm close to the edge I make myself think of- even write down- all of the names of people here who will miss me if I leave the way I still miss my Dad. It doesn't neccessarily keep me sane, but it does keep me around for awhile longer. My birthday is in September, my parent's anniversary was the 10th of September, my dad died in October, and his birthday was in November. I don't know if it's winter blues, SAD disorder, PTSD or the cronology but this time of year is REALLY hard. Not fair, I knoow, but 9-11 suffering has put me in a lot of good company. There are enough of us out there, we should be able to help each other through. Bless you all for writing...it's therapy for you, and for everyone who now knows they aren't alone.
P.S. Paxil made me lightheaded and loopy...I didn't have a care in the world...not about bills, going to work, etc., etc. NOT FOR ME

[This message has been edited by oldbetsy16 (edited 08-06-2002).]

[This message has been edited by moderator1 (edited 08-06-2002).]

[Clover]

My father had ptsd from Vietnam. He never discussed a lot with me. I knew he had problems but he was so happy the last three years. He was seeing a wonderful lady that i know was his soul mate. Everything seemed great. They were traveling the United States and loving it. I came home from work one day a few months ago and was told he killed himself. I know he snapped. This was not planned. Im not sure if he was taking his meds or not but he did miss 5 or so counseling sessions. I guess what im trying to get across is you can be happy but you always have PTSD. You might think you doing great and quit taking your medicine or going to counseling but its always there. You have to find a way to be happy and learn to live with it. For my family it was to late. Hopefully i can help someone else.