I have dark hair myself, I think its the Italian in me :/ the color bugged me so much that I remove it in all areas, and I just stared doing my "sideburns" a month ago, im glad I did. Im using a wax product called "Nads" that you used cold so the heat does not hurt the skin on your face. Press down, bite your lip, and rip! Mine did not hurt to bad, just make sure not to go too high, just get the dark hairs on the sides of your face. Let the hairs grow back till you notice, then wax again. I do this on the side of my face every 3-4 weeks (the hair is thin in that area *usually* so it not like looking at unshaved legs ^_^)
for upper lip I use wax or nair and I shave my arms and legs.