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-   -   Can somebody please explain why I am this way (http://www.healthboards.com/boards/shyness/907825-can-somebody-please-explain-why-i-am-way.html)

I love music 07-03-2012 03:04 PM

Can somebody please explain why I am this way
 
Hi.so basically I am really shy. I always have been but it has gotten worse lately. I refused to go round to my neighbour who I have known all my life to give him some banana bread yesterday. Today I was in town and I hate being served at the till because it's so awkward and I just want to avoid it all together. Also when I have to do solo talks in school I start shaking and when I am doing them I stare at one spot the whole time. I also find it very difficult to look people in the eye/face. And when my friends try to hug me I pull away because I hate that sorta thing. I'm scared I will never get a boyfriend. There was a point a couple of months ago where I was confident but that has seemed to have gone as I don't know why? My parents just tease me about being so shy. I don't know how to stop being so shy?!

LoonyLily 07-04-2012 02:51 PM

Re: Can somebody please explain why I am this way
 
Hey honey.

First of all, stop worrying! That won't get you anywhere. You've got to set yourself targets instead of fretting about the "whole picture". Take it step by step.

First step, try something small. No biggie, like take the bread around to your neighbour, smile politely and then it'll be over. One issue overcome, as simple as that! Second, buy something from a shop and pay for it yourself. Ask teachers for homework help even if you don't need it, ask a friendly classmate questions about work...Basically, set yourself daily targets.

I know how you feel though, I really do. I used to be shy and would hate it when people asked me questions. On the first day of school whenever a teacher got us to talk about ourselves in front of the whole class I'd freeze. But I did things to help overcome. I volunteered to be a Peer Mentor, I helped my friend set up a club for nervous Year Seven students, in Year 11 I was a Prefect and now I've volunteered in a PDSA shop.

All you need is to give YOURSELF chances. If you sit in the corner constantly thinking that you're so shy you'll never be able to talk to anyone, you never will be able to talk to anyone.

Just take it small steps at a time and seize opportunities as they come along. You don't need to be shy. :)

Best of luck

shevro 06-29-2014 10:20 AM

Re: Can somebody please explain why I am this way
 
Shyness is a personality until you feel comfortable with it and dont feel any urge to talk too much with others., but it bcomes a problem when u r very much eager to talk with others but cant do as yo are shy...i myself is so shy that i dont even talk to my cousins nor do i have a lot of friends...ya it's difficult to get rid of this, and can't overcome it...i would suggest you to join some personality development programmes.. otherwise its difficult to get away frm shyness

MightyAJ 07-25-2014 02:19 AM

Re: Can somebody please explain why I am this way
 
I'm sure you will meet someone and accept you for who you are. But little by little atleast try to let go of your fear and be confident. Thats the only way to fight shyness


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