this is my first post on here, and i am so desperate.
since i was a child i have had a very serious phobia of insomnia. it really is serious and is destroying my life. i have done anything it takes to fall asleep and i always manage to do so. the problem that i have is that the fear is still huge and i think its getting bigger. it is so hard to focus on life and i have a family that deserve so much better than a father that is obsessed by this phobia. i feel like i haven't got the strength to go on sometimes and have recently been put on antidepressants. its such a mess and i don't know the answer or how the story ends. i have done cbt which was helpful to show me that the fear was a misunderstanding in my mind and i genuinely believe that no harm will ever really come from not sleeping.
the problem is that for some reason my mind refuses to let go of the fear and it terrorizes me so so much.
i feel so alone as i have never spoke to anybody that shares my phobia.
if you can help me in any way i would be so so grateful
I hope you are doing well. I think you have generalized anxiety and it is manifesting itself as a fear. Some people have other irrational fears, fear of going outside, fear of certain foods etc, which make no sense, but are fears none the less. I believe you need to find ways to take your mind off thinking about not sleeping in such a negative light. As you wrote, you have no trouble sleeping, so obviously this is not keeping you awake and it sounds as though you have learned to think of sleep negatively. You need to start to view sleep as a positive thing. I myself love lying in bed and slowly drifting off, letting my mind go and just enjoying the warmness of my bed. Enjoy life, right now it seems as though your mind is caught in a rut of thinking about sleep, Enjoy life and all it has to offer, exercise, spending time with family, watching tv with loved ones. Enjoy life because it is short and you only have one. I wish you all the best and remember, once you start "forgetting" about your negative sleep thoughts, you will be surprised how quickly you forget about sleep at all.
I posted earlier but not sure if it went through. Try to relax and take you mind of sleeping. You seem to worry about something that will not happen. For example, you worry about sleep, but you sleep fine, so you might have generalized anxiety, that has manifested itself as a fear. Try and go back to a therapist to work on ways to control your fear and quiet your mind from excessive thinking. Take time to enjoy life and all it has to offer. Try yoga or meditation to work on relaxation. Soon you will realize how amazing life is and all the amazing things it has to offer. Don't get down on yourself and don't let something that is "in your head" ruin your life. Don't let the thieves of yesterday or tomorrow ruin today.
One last thing, with any phobia or anxiety, try to avoid looking it up excessively on-line. The less mind time you devote to this, the more likely it is to leave your mind and not negatively impact you.
Last edited by timsmith4444; 02-18-2012 at 12:14 PM.