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Old 02-11-2004, 07:52 PM   #1
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Unhappy Day 7 and I am going to break!

Hi there, I just read through a few of the posts, and am having a hard time here. I don't know why I am here, but I am on day 7...which is almost over...and I can't take it. I don't think I am ready for this. Everyone I know is being so supportive, yet, I don't want to hear how great I am doing, and "you can do it", etc, etc...I want them to tell me that I can go have a cigarette. BUt I realize they are not going to do that.
I have broke down crying several times since I quit. This didn't happen the last time I quit (2 yrs ago - made it only 32 days). I keep crying, and often its a sobbing type! In fact I was going to stop this evening to get a pack but due to the tears pouring out, I couldn't go in...I keep deciding I am going to go get some but my eyes are so red from crying that I don't go. This is probably God's way to help me through, huh.
I guess my point here is that I am very unhappy. Does anyone know what I mean by the crying? Or am I the only one?

 
Old 02-11-2004, 08:39 PM   #2
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

Laney00--

I'm sorry Lanny that you are going through a rough time with it. But let me promise you this...it will get better and you will feel better too. You are just going through the withdrawl process, and it looks like for you that it's taking a little bit longer. I assume that you are not using patches or gum? That would probably help you there. Are you keeping yourself busy enough so that you are not just sitting around thinking about them constantly? Are you drinking a lot of water and juices? I think you are just going through the w/d process thus leading to the crying. Some of us do get depressed for a while when we quit. It does go away though. I would recommend you to get some form of nicotene replacement therapy, it sounds to me like you would greatly benefit from that. I quit 4.5 months ago, after 30 years of a pack a day. I'm still using nic patches, w/o which I think I wouldn't have been able to go this far.
I'm glad that your eyes were red and that stopped you from going to the store to make that deadly purchase. Please don't give up! I understand your loved one's telling you that "you can do it". They care about you! If I were to start smoking again, I'd have to hide it from my grown kids, as they used to get so upset about my smoking. When I first quit they were always telling me that same thing, "you can do it". I think (I know) you can too, Laney, (because I did, and that was a major miracle!). Please try to remember that this will pass and you will feel sooo much better. It just takes time. If you absolutely feel that you can't get through this, then try to get some form of NRT.

I'm going to say a prayer for you Laney right now! You pray too!
It's getting late, but by tomorrow AM you'll be hearing from all the other people here (they are great too) that will be encouraging you as well, so stick around, and hang in there...please!!!

Hugs,
DEDA

 
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Old 02-12-2004, 04:56 AM   #3
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

Hey Laney

((((((BIG HUG)))))))

I hear ya!

Maybe the smoking was a smokescreen to hide all the sadness and frustrations in your life ... what you crying about? maybe talking through the things that upset you may make things easier for you.

You know, smoking (and all other addictions) are really tranquilsers for many different emotions ... we get so used to sticking a cigarette/food/acohol in our mouths to somehow quiten the misery within ... so maybe we can all discuss it here and help you release some of this stuff....

For me, I went many years as an overweight child (constant comfort eating) ... to taking up smoking - (comfort smoking) ... now I'm off the cigarettes, I took up eating again! Now, after nearly 3 months, I am making headway and am getting my head straight and doing stuff to release stress/anger/frustration in a more positive way .. try some relaxation tapes ... they are really helping me a lot.

I cried those tears too, and still do sometimes ... especially when I'm angry and resentful about some of the cards I've been dealt. We supress our emotions by smoking, when we give it up ... all those demons come out of us ... just know you are releasing them right now, even though it may not make sense to you when you are crying

Tears are food for the soul ... don't be distressed by it, see it as a God given tool to help you release stuff that is held in you, that is ready to be let go of. See this as a gift to yourself ...

Whatever love, do not smoke ... we are all here for you.

Lots of Love XXXXX
Invic

 
Old 02-12-2004, 06:39 AM   #4
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

Amen to that!

Yes Laney you are def. going thru withdrawal. One of the times I quit before I boo hoo'd all week. LOL You'll laugh at yourself in a few weeks - been there done that.

Invinc is right though - sometimes there's other things underneath the smoke screen that you need to work out. You have to realize that you're doing the right thing......don't you remember all the reasons that led you to quit to begin with? Don't let the w/d symptoms fool ya because they sure as helck will try to convince into going bk to smoking.

You don't want to die young, have a hole in your throat, stink, or go thru painful cancer so just hang in there. If you already went 7 days cold turkey - I would say to keep going because your def. thru the worst of it - you just have to hang in there. Yes, the Lord is tryin to tell you somethin - don't do it!

My prayers are with you and work it out Laney - you really are doing great because you are now past hell week. Be proud of yourself whether your crying or not.

Laurie

 
Old 02-12-2004, 10:04 AM   #5
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

I wish that I could say something to make you not want a smoke but I don't think I can. It comes from within. You know you really want to be a non-smoker and getting there is worth the tears. Someone that my sister knows quit and had tantrums on the floor like a toddler. So what, at least she didn't smoke. I read in a book that you shouldn't feel like you are depriving yourself. You would be if you picked up another pack. Depriving yourself of the future maybe. Try some deep breathing and relaxing. Remember that you can smoke if you want to but that isn't going to do you a bit of good. Write a list of reasons for quitting. Keep it close by. Good luck.

 
Old 02-12-2004, 10:17 AM   #6
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

Happy is too right and that reminds me - in my first week - I literally screamed and threw myself on the couch. LOL

So feel good about only crying now that I think about it. LOL

 
Old 02-12-2004, 11:59 AM   #7
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

Thank you everyone for the words of encouragement. I wish I would have joined this particular group earlier...I went and bought a pack today...smoked one right away, and I don't feel better...I cried all night..fell asleep for 2 hours and woke up for 4hours! Finally fell asleep by 6am. I woke up and had to deal with a major work issue (I don't even have to go in till later and already had to deal with work issues) .
I feel horrible that I smoked, and of course didn't check the boards until I did.
I have the puffiest eyes in the world...and the worst part is in a couple of hours I will be at work and my boss is going to think its due the the little issue we had this morning!

Thank you everyone, I think I will try again in a day or so. I will come back to discuss my withdrawels when I do. I can't deal with the guilt so I will be back when I quit.
You all are awesome. I can't believe the support I got within 12 hours of complaining!

 
Old 02-12-2004, 12:08 PM   #8
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

Aw well, at least you want to try again. Just don't give up Laney, it's not easy at first, we all know that. But once you get all the nico out of your system, you will feel so much better. Thanks for coming back and know that we're all here for you anytime you need us.

DEDA

 
Old 02-12-2004, 12:13 PM   #9
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

Thanks Deda, I remember back when I made it a month, I wasn't feeling this sort of pressure/depression...but then again maybe I was and just don't remember. I do know that if I could make it 7 days without a cig....there's no reason I can't do it again - and do I dare say - FOREVER!

 
Old 02-12-2004, 12:19 PM   #10
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

YES, you can say FOREVER! I do all the time...hehe. Don't wanna go through this torture anymore!!!! I feeling to good to screw it up now!! Yes if you could make it for 7 days, YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN. Better to not say forever, just say one day at a time,...I can make it through today not smoking. It's makes it easier to think that way, then later you can say for-ev-a!!!! LOL

Good luck!
DEDA
PS~When you quit you will jump for joy

 
Old 02-15-2004, 08:17 PM   #11
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Re: Day 7 and I am going to break!

Yes Laney - you can definitely say forever and make it happen. Remember YOU are controlling things here - it's a choice and sometimes we give it too much thought. If you think about it - your breathing in smoke and blowing it out - how ridiculous does that even sound when you seriously sit down and think about it? I mean when you analyze it - it starts to become a nuisance. Look at how it controls you, stinks, is unsocialable now, wastes your time, and most of all - what it can do to your skin and health - it's just NOT WORTH IT.

Just subtract the days you smoke and start again. It's that simple. Set your new quit date and say goodbye - do your funeral or whatever you have to do but please remember why it is you quit to begin with. Write it down and keep it with you. Just say no! It really does get to the point (I'm at 87 days now) where you just don't want it and as time goes on and your body repairs itself from all of the smoking damage - you get relieved and excited about how your getting your life back, more energy, can breath better and have a higher endurance for working out - which of course will only make you look better, etc... It's your life and it's time you take control of it!!!!

My prayers are with you and please say one yourself -= it really does help

Laurie

 
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