Jenetti

yea just like Liamsmom says, pick yourself up, dust yourself and try again. i was doing great for 3 days, then today i smoked one cigarette. I have fibromyalgia plus a whole lotta other health problems. but the fibro is in flareup mode right now, my feet are hurting so bad i can barely walk, i feel like im nothing but pain and Jenetti is lost way way deep inside it somewhere. Like im not living with pain, but pain is the major personality and in between somewhere deep inside all those different levels and severity of pain, i exist. So , while in tears from the pain, i smoked one, and puffed in between tears of pain and tears of feeling like a loser for giving in to it. but after my cigarette, i got up and slowly and carefully walked to my cabinet where i keep them, and crushed the rest into peices. i know i cant drive right now and go get any since i can barely walk even inside my own home, so im hoping i can dust myself off again, and tomorrow is a new day, a better one since i dont have any more cigs in the drawer to make it easy for me to grab one out of pity and pain and smoke it. but, we're humans with weaknesses, but we also have strenghts, and it gave me a sense of power to crush them and throw them away. so , dont get too down on yourself for missing the mark once, you know and understand that you did something you wished you hadnt, you gave in , but like i said tomorrow is another day, another day to prove to yourself (and myself) that we are also strong.