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Old 12-24-2006, 05:33 AM   #1
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Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

One of the reasons I needed to stop smoking was because I need to have surgery, and my surgeon won't do it unless I quit. Also, my surgeon requires that I have a psyche evaluation before surgery, so I had one.

Okay, so I took the tests the psychiatrist told me to take. You know the kind……you use a Number 2 Pencil and fill in the bubbles. Two different personality tests, et al. I called his office last week and left a voicemail, asking him to please fax the results to my surgeon. He calls me back and tells me that he wants to discuss a few things with me.

Uh oh. Hmmm. Okay.

So I go into his office yesterday to discuss the results. He’s ‘troubled’ by some of my answers, and thinks I need to see him once a week for three months to work on some of my ‘issues’. This guy thinks I’m certifiable, and is going to tell my surgeon that I shouldn’t have the surgery just now.

What the Hell?

I guess that’s what I get for being completely honest in my answers. He went over those answers with me, and I gave him my explanations for giving those answers. Each time I gave him an explanation, he gave me the once-over and mumbled, “Uh HUH.” And then scribbled something on his note pad.

Sanctimonious, judgmental sonofabi-otch.

Here’s your explanations, buddy. The REASON I have nightmares each night is because I’m wearing a freakin’ nicotine patch. The nicotine patch is notorious for causing nightmares. My surgeon told me I hafta quit smoking, so I haven’t had a cigarette in 33 days now. The nicotine patch helps takes some of the edginess away.

The REASON I am anxious and edgy is because I haven’t had a cigarette in 33 days, after having smoked for over 20 years.

The REASON I’m a little depressed at this time of year is because I don’t get to see my family. Holy Crap. ANYONE would be a tad depressed because of missing family members at the holidays. Add to the equation that people trying to quit smoking experience depression and, voila, you have a patient, such as I, stating: “Yes, I experience depression.”

Stupid freakin’ “read everything negative you can about this woman and her answers” doctor (and I use the term ‘doctor’ loosely).

The REASON I nibble on food – even when I’m not hungry – is because I’m trying to find a substitute for sticking a damn cigarette into my mouth. You call it bingeing. I call it finding a substitute for a cigarette. It’s not bingeing, you idiot.

So, this unprepossessing fool holds the keys, as it were, to me having this surgery that I need. With one sweeping, generalization about me to my surgeon, he holds the power to either allow me to have this life-altering surgery, or to deny me the hope I’ve built upon for the past year.

Man, I want a cigarette. Bad. It’s seven o’clock in the morning on Christmas Eve, and I’m thinking of hoofing it down to the local convenience store and getting a pack.

I emailed my surgeon when I got home yesterday from Doctor Whats-his-face, and told him just what I think of the so-and-so, and WHY I answered the way I did to some of those questions. With everything I’ve read about my surgeon – and from my assessment when I met him in person – he strikes me as genuinely interested in helping people like me. I'm thinking of emailing this entry to him.

*sigh* I need a cigarette in a very bad way.
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Old 12-24-2006, 07:41 AM   #2
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SanyBelle HB UserSanyBelle HB UserSanyBelle HB UserSanyBelle HB User
Re: Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bullwinkle2
.......Man, I want a cigarette. Bad. It’s seven o’clock in the morning on Christmas Eve, and I’m thinking of hoofing it down to the local convenience store and getting a pack. <snip>
*sigh* I need a cigarette in a very bad way.
The pdoc sounds like a jerk, hopefully your surgeon will proceed on with the surgery w/o his input.

About wanting a cigarette, I really hate the cigarette companies for getting me hooked (okay, I picked up the first cig, but gee, did they have to make it so addictive???), I'll always want a cigarette... the cravings are much easier to deal with after 7 months, but that feeling in my stomach is always there.



And.... remember what you wrote in another thread:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bullwinkle2
Wow. Suddenly I feel like a whiney brat when I think I NEED a cigarette.

Thank you for your post. I needed to read that. My paradigm has shifted. Yesterday I was thinking that I CAN'T stay quit.

This morning I know that I MUST stay quit. Tomorrow will make three weeks.


Good luck and Have a Happy Holiday!

TF

 
Old 12-27-2006, 03:13 PM   #3
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Re: Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

Hey Bullwinkle ****** that psychiatrist what an a$$ hole. Your doin great and don't let a little detour derail your great progress. !!!!!!!

 
Old 01-01-2007, 08:03 AM   #4
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confrustrated HB User
Re: Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

Did he say he wanted the eval done by that psych? If not, see another!! I can't imagine they will all be like that!
Good luck and way to go!!!!!

 
Old 01-01-2007, 11:44 AM   #5
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Re: Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bullwinkle2
I need a cigarette in a very bad way.
According to "health-care-notes" at blagspot, 30 days is the most critical period! My congratulations!

 
Old 01-01-2007, 12:47 PM   #6
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Re: Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

People, people, PEOPLE!!!!!!!!

I made it. I turned the corner. I am 40 days smoke-free!!

WOO HOO!!!

Thanks for the continued support of all of you.
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Old 01-05-2007, 03:53 AM   #7
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Re: Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

WAY TO GO!! My boyfriend quit smoking cold turkey right before Thanksgiving. I was so proud of him and I'm so proud of you too!!

 
Old 01-05-2007, 10:34 AM   #8
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Thumbs up Re: Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

Let me add my congratulations to the mix! You have made it past the hardest point....some people don't make it 33 hours (or 3 hours in some cases). Pat yourself on the back and know you have taken a GIANT step in improving your health and life!!

Way to go!

Dave
Smoke Free since 2/9/06!

 
Old 01-05-2007, 08:09 PM   #9
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Memaw649 HB User
Re: Thirty-three days without a cigarette, but wanting one...

Bullwinkle, you are awesome!! Keep it up! You're doin' soooooooo good. Be proud. Have you told people that you are now a non-smoker? Don't that sound good?!!

Memaw

 
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