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Old 12-09-2007, 06:26 PM   #1
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mizzaj HB User
Feeling Guilty

I am a closet smoker-- my friends know that I enjoy a cigarette socially, but all except one knows that I smoke 1/2 to 1 pack per day. About almost a month ago, I decided I would quit. I've been having stomach problems for 10 months, and my doc suggested that quitting might help. Have any of you had digestive troubles that were helped by quitting smoking? A part of me feels that if I stop and the digestive stuff doesn't get better, I'll be very disappointed.

I want to quit. I'm ashamed to have this nasty habit that I can't kick. I quit once for 10 months, but started up again when I became nervous about a new job. At the time that I quit, it felt great to be able to breathe comfortably without coughing and not be tethered to the addiction, but other than that I felt no different.

I figured the best time to quit would be when I went to visit friends for a few days. I knew I couldn't smoke around them, so I bought the patch, which worked for me before, and wore it each day I was visiting. When I returned home where I have all my triggers, I immediately bought a pack. The first cigarette was nasty, but I kept smoking, and here I am, still smoking.

My therapist was very invested in me quitting. Perhaps b/c I told her I wanted to, but also because she cares about me (our moms are colleagues) and doesn't want to see me fighting this addiction. After my trip, I told her I had quit, and she believes I still have. I feel awful. I let my one friend know that I was still smoking, and she was understanding and non judgmental. But I am feeling so guilty about my therapist believing that I stopped when I'm still smoking.

I really, really want to quit. Does anyone have any suggestions about the best way to do it? I know I will use the patch, but that initial motivation to quit is lacking-- I guess due to the stress I've had with stomach issues that never plagued me before. I feel like without it, I won't have that one pick me up that I felt helped me deal with the stress of having undiagnosed stomach problems. If anyone has any suggestions on how to initiate the quit, please let me know. Once I'm a few days or weeks in I think I'll be okay. But I know myself, and it's taking that first step that's been so hard for me....HELP!

 
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Old 12-10-2007, 11:34 AM   #2
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Fibrana HB User
Re: Feeling Guilty

Hi there,

One of my reasons for quitting was also stomach problems for 9 months that wouldn't go away, plus a sore throat and tongue. I quit because of physical reasons and really didn't want to quit, but have no choice. I cheated a couple of times, and the problems came back, so I kind of know it's final this time. That doesn't make it easy. I still crave one many times a day.

I'm at 8 months now and it's getting a bit easier. All I can suggest is to plant firmly in your mind that it is final this time and you will never, ever smoke again, no matter what. I have had mega stress in my life since quitting, so I know it's not easy. I ask myself, "how will smoking make this situation any easier?". It won't! My stomach and throat problems would just come back and make things worse.

I recommend using the nicotine aids for as long as you have to. My dad used the nicotine gum for 10 years!!! Do whatever you have to do. The nicotine won't hurt you, it's all the other chemicals when you light a cigarette. I work for doctors and they all say that anything is better than smoking. I'm still wearing a 7 mg patch, it's kind of my security blanket.

Best of luck to you!!!

 
Old 12-12-2007, 09:21 AM   #3
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mizzaj HB User
Re: Feeling Guilty

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fibrana View Post
Hi there,

One of my reasons for quitting was also stomach problems for 9 months that wouldn't go away, plus a sore throat and tongue. I quit because of physical reasons and really didn't want to quit, but have no choice. I cheated a couple of times, and the problems came back, so I kind of know it's final this time. That doesn't make it easy. I still crave one many times a day.

I'm at 8 months now and it's getting a bit easier. All I can suggest is to plant firmly in your mind that it is final this time and you will never, ever smoke again, no matter what. I have had mega stress in my life since quitting, so I know it's not easy. I ask myself, "how will smoking make this situation any easier?". It won't! My stomach and throat problems would just come back and make things worse.

I recommend using the nicotine aids for as long as you have to. My dad used the nicotine gum for 10 years!!! Do whatever you have to do. The nicotine won't hurt you, it's all the other chemicals when you light a cigarette. I work for doctors and they all say that anything is better than smoking. I'm still wearing a 7 mg patch, it's kind of my security blanket.

Best of luck to you!!!

Thank you, Fibrana! I appreciate your honesty and it's interesting to hear how you've handled your own quitting situation. What kind of digestive issues did you have while you smoked? how long after quitting did they go away? Did you suspect that smoking was part of the problem?

A part of me is afraid that quitting won't change anything for my digestion. I know it's BETTER for me not to smoke in general, but I got so used to it being my pick-me-up-- especially during these last 9 months of dealing with the frustration of undiagnosed digestive issues.

Your suggestion to plant the idea firmly in my mind and say that I won't do it again is a good one. It's very decisive, which is exactly what I'm lacking right now-- decisiveness. I also need to pick a quit date and not due what I've been doing-- after I finish a pack, I tell myself "Okay, the quitting starts now" and then I end up buying another pack. If I have a date, hopefully I'll be able to focus on it more and not beat myself up over the cigs I smoke until that date.

that's good to know that one can wear the patch longer if needed. given that I'm somewhat worried about weight gain, it sounds like a good solution for that too-- weaning your body off of something, rather than yanking away part of what it'd grown to know for so long in one motion. I've always known that it's the smoke that's the worst part. Nicotine isn't great for you, I'm sure, but it's probably like caffeine in that we could do without it, but it's not as awful as the irritants and carcinogens from the cigarette smoke.

Well, take care, keep up your quitting, and write back on this thread if you get the chance!

AJ

 
Old 12-12-2007, 10:18 AM   #4
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Fibrana HB User
Re: Feeling Guilty

Hi again,

Glad I could be of help. With me, I really had no choice but to quit because my tongue and throat were so sore, I was in tears. Just threw the pack out and said "that's it!".

My digestive problems were 9 months of retching and vomiting, pretty much every morning. It has basically gone away since quitting smoking, so I think my body was telling me to quit in every way possible. I was also drinking green tea in the morning which seemed to aggravate it, so I stopped that and don't drink tea until the afternoon. I found that drinking orange Gatorade every morning first thing when I got up helped me.

You can do this! Just be sure you really, really want to quit, or like in my case, had to quit.

Good luck!!!

Hugs.

 
Old 12-12-2007, 01:13 PM   #5
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Location: Columbus, Oh
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noggin7717 HB User
Re: Feeling Guilty

I've been a closet smoker for quite some time now. No smoking at work, and only outside away from everything and everyone when home. Wife knew I smoked, not that kind of closet. Was smoking about 1/2 pack a day.

I also have been having GI issues, GERD is what I'm DX'ed with, and I had tried everything the doctor told me to do to ease the GERD symptoms...except stop smoking. He told me to lose 10lbs, I lost 23lbs. He told me to raise head of bed, did that. Stop coffee(caffeine), I cut back 50% caffeine, now at 0% caffeine for the past 4 months. On the nexium, zantac, carafate.

I switched doctors because I was doing everything the previous doc asked and still had the GI issues. The new doc basically said I really should stop smoking, the nicotine (not just cigs, but any nicotine) relaxes the valve that holds back the acid from washing up into your esophagus. The new doc asked me if I needed any help stopping smoking...after a month or so, I said I needed help.

He has me on Wellbutrin, and this past Monday was my last cigarette ... I hope. I've quit several times before, anywhere from 2-15 months at a time with the help of nicotine replacements (lozenges, gum, patch) but I've always fallen off the wagon... This time it's "cold turkey" w/ help of wellbutrin. I hope this time it works.

-Noggin

 
Old 12-13-2007, 09:23 AM   #6
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Liamsmom HB User
Re: Feeling Guilty

Good luck noggin you can do it just keep your thoughts on the reason why you're doing it better health, I use to have terrible apnea and I haven't had it since I quit or at least I don't wake myself up any more. I can also go up several flights of stairs with out collapsing, I walk 5 miles a week no matter the weather not only do I save $$$ on not buying smokes but on laundry too because my clothing doesn't stink. There are too many benefits to count. I did it cold turkey also if I can do it anyone can next thing to conquer is caffeine and chocolate.

Good luck everyone it's worth it the freedom

 
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