I so agree with everything you said velveeta! I am a quitter of 1 1/2 yrs. I was a die hard smoker, I was NEVER going to quit. Now I cannot imagine myself as a smoker. I love not hacking, smelling and being a slave to the smokes. And best of all this winter, I am not freezing my a$$ off to have a smoke.
I can promise all of you it will get better!! There will come a day when you do not even think of smoking. You do not have to worry about if you can smoke here or there. The withdrawls you are going through will go away. You will and can live smoke free.
Get help if you need it, do whatever you need to and stay quit. Treat nictotine for what it is a drug. You can beat this, there are two of right now on this board as proof!!!
Good for you velveeta!