have to quit , not quite ready =( - Smoking Cessation Message Board

tiggy44 · 02-21-2008, 04:08 AM

Hi all.. Im 41, 4 wonderful children all 16 and under. Single mom but very much taken =) You would think I would stop everytime I see my children, or think of how my dad and his two sisters died of cancer, smokers yes. I have smoked for about 5 yrs now. Started when I was going thru my divorce. In my heart I know i have to stop, one reason is found out I have hpv which with smoking can lead to cervical cancer-- have i stopped ?? No still have about 2 to 3 a day. Nothing is making me stop. Not seeing my kids, seeing how sick my dad was, my health issue. I have even put a note in my cig case reminding myself the danger I could be putting myself in.
Question... I went from a pack a day to half a pack now 3 or 2 a day. I think I am on the right track here BUT that night time cigerette is so hard to let go. Its almsot like its my time to have my hot tea and relax after my long day.
Do i want to quit??? well yes and no.. Am i ready to quit -- no. Do I know i have to? Yes.. I just need some support to help me wean myself off them. Weekends and nights are the biggest challenge for me.
Thankyou for listening,

petlover1003 · 02-22-2008, 03:39 PM

tiggy44, I sure wish you luck!! Like you I cut down from a pack a day to 1/2 a pack, then to 2-3 a day (all this after smoking for 42 years!). I finally realized that if I'm ever going to quit, this is the time. I know myself well enough that those 2-3 per day would just go up again in time.

I started taking Chantix for 8 or 9 days before I totally went from those 2-3 to ZERO. After a couple of days I also started taking Xanax to help me through the emotional, weepiness I was experiencing. Have you tried any kind of stop smoking aid?? You may need a little crutch to get you through this....I know I did! There's patches, gum, meds, so much on the market right now. You need to make up your mind to quit and then just DO IT. Keep busy and know that the first week will be tough, but it does get easier!! Good Luck! Today is Day 14 for me....I know the worst is behind me!

tiggy44 · 02-22-2008, 08:20 PM

thanks.. well today was a bad day, had about 4 or 5 =( seem to have more when i am home. I havent tried anything yet, just thought i could do this on my own when im ready. Thing is i have to stop, im not wanting too. stupid thing to say isnt it? dont know what else to say im so depressed. hpv, smoking,smoking =cancer, i give up

AnnD · 02-22-2008, 09:18 PM

Everyone has a story...mine was...about 12 or 13 yrs ago I could no long afford our State jacking up the prices of a carton to some ridiculous amount of money so one day I went grocery shopping and instead of buying my usual several cartons of cigs I bought the nicotine patch instead...not cheap either but with the aid of the patch I only needed step one and two and I was done with cigs. I didn't plan on it or taper down (I was a chain smoker) I didn't negotiate with myself or waffle back and forth...I just decided this was the day that I could no longer afford it. I knew that if I had even one cigarette in the house I would be smoking it so that was that. I didn't discuss it with anyone I just stopped..it was like a personal thing that I had to do myself. I enjoyed smoking and I'm not sure if you ever get over it but I can tell you this my 4 kids were soooo happy that I quit! It really does make the things in the house and you smell so much better. Smoke gets on everything I remember getting gifts in the mail from my brother a smoker and the air in the box smelled like smoke. When he died 9 years ago from Lung Cancer I got all his art work that he had collected over the years and they all smelled so thick of old cigarette smoke as did all his clothes. You just don't notice when you are the smoker. Anyway, good luck with your journey.

velveeta · 02-23-2008, 07:13 AM

I agree with AnnD. When you are ready, you will quit! Simple as that.