I really need help here. I have been a closet smoker for over 25 years. I am 50 now and I want to throw that habit. My husband, daughter and my son know that I smoke. My son who is 24 does too. I live alone and I really wanted to quit. Yesterday with a lot of bravado i flushed down my about 10 cigarettes the toilet. But today I went and got another packet. I have smoked 2 now. I really want to quit because I have also started on a weight reduction program. I find exercising strenuous. I have hesitated to join any support group because I thought I can do it on my own. In any case being a closet smoker, I don't want the world to know my problem. Should I try nicotine patches? If there any ex-smokers can you please help me and support me?
Yes you cant replace nicotine with nicotine. It's ridiculous. The cigerette companies know this because they are they OWN the patches. Besides, most nicotine leaves your body overnight thats why you can sleep and all out of your system in 24 hours. It was the habit for me I was mostly a binge smoker when I drank. I had laser gum surgery and had no desire to smoke anymore so, I got lucky.
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You can use nicotine to help quit! People do it all the time it just depends on what works best for you. Some people do it cold turkey and never pick up a cigarette again and others need to do gradually using nicotine replacement like me do what you think will work the best for you.
I know you are a closet smoker, but maybe coming clean about it to a friend so u can have someone to lean one will help. It's harder when you feel like you have to do it alone.
I smoked for 10 years and stopped about 17 months ago, after many failed attempts! There are three things that worked for me:
1 - Being ready! I don't think I was on the previous attempts
2 - Easyway to Stop Smoking by Allen Carr
3 - Support
The aim of the book is to unravel all the marketing and society "brainwashing" which convinces us we need to smoking, showing you that you don't need to smoke at all and stopping should be a positive experience - not a struggle or hardship.
However I did need support, since another teaching of the book is to smoke your last cigarette and then stop - you're now a non-smoker! And I got some bizarre looks and unconvinced reactions when I said "I'm a non-smoker" having been a smoker the day before... but they sure are convinced by now!
Lastly, good luck and enjoy your freedom from smoking
Loveleen, where are you? You say you can do this on your own, wrong. We can support you here. You need people who understand where you are coming from. To say that you were a closet smoker and your family knows you are a smoker, you were never in the closet to start with. Smoke get into your hair, skin pores, clothes, and the smell stays. Just take it one day at a time if you going cold turkey. Get straws to chew on and hard candy to suck on. Read books, exercise, get a hobby, something to keep you busy and keep the mind off the cigs. You can do it. And there is never a good time to quit, just quit and think about the money you will save from not smoking everyday. Good luck and if you need encouragement, come in here. You will be fine. Hugs for today.
Stephanie, good ideas but you forgot one thing, a start date and to stick to it and find ways to help may it stick. You can get sugarless hard candy, straws, exercise like walking, and get a hobby, to keep the hands busy. There is never a good time and there are going to times when you get stressed out and temptation will be great to start lighting up again. You may have to try several time before the quite sticks. You can do it. Just say to your self everybody, I can do this. I am strong and I want to smell better. And go for it. Count the dollars saved from the quit. Come to the boards and rant if there are problems. You all can do it, I did. Hugs to everyone today and hang in there.
I am quitting smoking now. I haven't smoked in 3 days. Yes it is just a few days...but I hope I can help you. I am one of those "intense" smokers. When I smoke I smoke 3 in a row. It is a serious craving. I have tried the patch and I know it has worked for MANY people. I on the other hand, I would just rip it off and smoke more! I finally made myself get Chantix. I have heard all the horrible stories that are associated with Chantix...but I know myself. I do not have the will power to quit cold turkey, I don't really care about using the patch...but making myself take medication everyday to help quit... that I can do. It is working. I can't explain how it works...it just does. I smoked a pack a day on chantix for the first 8 days and did not think there was going to be any changes...then all of a sudden, when I started taking the full milligram, it was a miracle...I had no urge to smoke. I guess what I am trying to say is...try Chantix. Yes there are possible side affects...but if you are aware of them then maybe you can work through them. Right now I am bloated (side affect from Chantix) and a little moody...but I went from 20 cigarettes to 0.
I'm in a similar place to you. A furtive smoker who waits until others are gone so I can light up. I know so well that it is terrible for me, and have quit for up to 4 weeks at a time. But, have slipped every time. It is so frustrating to have no control, like watching myself load bullets into a gun and put it at my head. For a non smoker, it must seem crazy-off-the-wall behavior. But I seem to sleepwalk into doing it again and again. I'm not off them at the moment. But need another try. Maybe a one to one mentor is the way to go, anybody done this ?
You may be getting into the frame of mind where you are ready to quit with the steps you have taken to quit. Now the other parts, are you exercising, like walking? Are you keeping busy like reading, picking up a hobby? You need to find ways to keep the hands and mind busy, to keep it off the cigs. Then when you are totally off the cigs, you will feel better and will be more busy. You keep hanging in there. You can do it. Just use what works for you. Not everyone can go cold turkey. It is the mindset. You are ready to quit. hugs for today.
So true Rosier it is all about when you are ready to stop smoking and become a non smoker. Your mind needs to stay focused and you need to change your routine which can take some time but it will happen if you really want it. I never ever thought I could ever give up as the smokes had a hold of me, stress, social, bored, drinking alcohol, talking on the phone...... And on it goes ... I gave the smokes away cold turkey and always said I could not do that needed help with replacements, which turns out to be un true. just needed to tell my brain i was a non smoker and change my life style slightly. It has been over 5 months now and I am a happy non smoker who goes to the gym and saves around $400 dollars per month. I have a card in my wallet and it has the date I gave up smoking and says " I AM A NON SMOKER TODAY AND FOREVER" Just a reminder ever time I open my wallet it works for me and may help others. I have said right from day one I AM A NON SMOKER, never once said I have given up smoking to anyone, I feel this has made me stay strong and positive .... I love my new life as a non smoker
The Following User Says Thank You to BurtG For This Useful Post:
I was a smoker for 25 years. I smoked from the time I was 12 until I was 38... I quit smoking on January 18, 2012. The process has been neither easy, or fun. But I can say that it has been very rewarding.
Here's how I quit..
1. I was hypnotized, so I had a stop date. This is important for anyone, I think, because it prepares a person for the mental loss.
2. I ate a lot of almonds. Almonds are a healthy snack and this prevented me from gaining tons of weight. Almonds are also a good way for fighting anxiety and stress... Whenever I craved a cigarette I would grab a handful of almonds and I would sit on my back patio (my old smoking lounge, so to speak), and I would think about why I wanted a cigarette. By the time I was done with the handful of almonds, the craving was gone.
3. I kept a pack of cigarettes in my house for six months after I quit... For most people this would be torture, but for me it was a security blanket, I told myself I could have a cigarette whenever I wanted, but every moment, I chose not to have one. My personality is such that if someone tells me "no," I find a way around the "no." So for me, the cigarettes that I kept represented me being bold enough to say no. It also really helped with my self esteem because I felt like I was beating the cigarettes.
4. I got an "iquit" ap on my iphone. Everyday it states how many days since I quit smoking, how many cigarettes I haven't smoked, and how much money I have saved by not smoking.
Today it reads:
"It's been one year, six months, and 15 days since your last cigarette. You have saved $4,217.21. You have have not smoked 16,868 cigarettes!"
This program is so encouraging. There are several available for ******** and every now & again I check in just out of curiosity...
The major thing(s) about smoking that no one ever told me is that when you quit smoking, you are losing a friend. This truly is a grieving process. Most people can't handle the anxiety, so they start smoking again. But you will experience this loss just like any other loss. You might find yourself in fits of rage, for no apparent reason, cry for no apparent reason, feel anxious for no apparent reason, and on and on. When I quit smoking I realized that I had been using cigarettes to avoid my feelings for twenty-five years. I stuffed and stuffed and stuffed. So when I quit, it all came bubbling to the surface.
I am still learning how to deal with my feelings, rather than stuff them. It's really difficult. Cigarettes were also my best friend. Whenever anything in life happened, the first thing I turned to was a cigarette, it didn't matter if it was good news, or bad. My cigarettes were always there.
The reason I quit is because I was in a bad accident and I needed several surgeries, but I couldn't have surgery until I stopped smoking. The doctors were willing to operate, but I knew that healing would be far worse, and with my spine, I wasn't willing to take a chance. So, I commend you for trying to quit. I would, most likely, still be smoking if not for the car accident.
In the end, I loved smoking. I loved everything about it. But once I wrapped my brain around it and I realized that cigarettes were my true addiction, I couldn't let them run my life anymore. And this secret you are keeping, is almost worse than the smoking. As others have pointed out, you will need support to get through this. And I wouldn't be surprised if people already know you smoke. Smoking leaves a nasty odor, and although you may not smell it, I can guarantee you nonsmokers do.
Anyway, hope my two cents helps. Best of luck to you & yours.
The Following User Says Thank You to kimm861 For This Useful Post:
Smoking isn't a problem. Trying to quit is something you should be proud of. It's not going to be easy, to be honest with you. Make sure the few people who know you smoke, are there for you whenever you need them. An emotional support system is key. Talking to a counselor along with medications can help tremendously in smoking cessation. Even after you do stop smoking you need to continue that support system. Also, choosing a new hobby, or something interesting you like to do. Avoid situations in which you know you will be tempted. And don't beat yourself up if you do pick up a cigarette after you've been going strong. It's a learning process. You just have to learn from your mistakes.