Day 14 - My Story - Smoking Cessation Message Board

Redhead23 · 08-15-2003, 04:20 AM

I am 25 years old, and started smoking occasionally when I was about 18. I was never one of the "in crowd" and it was never a popularity thing, but when I finally started going out and occasionally clubbing (usually "indie" and "britpop" nights) a packet of Silk Cut just became part of the whole experience. I only smoked at most a pack a week, never 2 days in a row and I usually went days without smoking or even feeling the slightest craving for it. I never told my parents, as deep down I did not want to be a smoker, I felt if I told them then I'd never end up stopping...

Then I met my ex-husband, an avid smoker and when I moved in with him I suddenly found myself smoking more and mroe often, especially since I could smoke when and as much as I wanted, and soon I was hooked and smoking rollies, up to a 12.5g pack a day. I used filter tips at least but still, a disgustingly high amount and very unlady-like. We had a lot of problems so I just started smoking more and more - I am out of that unhealthy relationship now but sadly I took the addiction with me.

I'd grown sick and tired of being hooked on the fags - I stopped enjoying many things because there, at the back of my mind, was always the question "When can I have my next cig?" or "Do I have enough baccy to last me the night?" etc. As soon as I got off the bus I'd start rolling a cig, I'd stop enjoying films and museum visits because I'd keep wanting another cig or
worrying I would not get my fix quickly enough. Nights out turned into an excuse to chain-smoke (after all at the pub it doesn't stand out so badly does it?) and as soon as I'd get back from work I'd light one rollie after the other for at least an hour, until I was suitably relaxed.

Ironically enough, I never had much of a problem getting through the day without a cigarette - never once did I get up feeling that I "needed" a cig! It was only when I was at home (especially at the PC) or at the pub that I'd suddenly turn into a chain-smoker!

Well, after many, many times of telling myself that I'd "quit today", I finally did it on Saturday, 2. August 2003. On a drunken night out, using the alcohol as an excuse to chain-smoke rollies (as per usual), I mentioned to my boyfriend that I wanted to quit (this is the first time that I acually said something to someone else), and he promptly went "Okay then we'll do it together!". I guess he probably thought I was just ranting drunkenly and didn't really mean it, bless him he had no idea how serious I was!

Anyhow, after nearly 5 years of smoking every day (from 5-30 rollies or 10-20 cigs a day, depending on whether I went out or not), which had followed 2 years of very occasional smoking, I quit cold turkey on Saturday 2nd August. Not only did a slight hangover help me not to run to the shop straight away (I'd chucked my tobacco tin, skins etc. into a bin outside the house), but something had "clicked" in my head, and I just KNEW that now, I was a non-smoker.

I'd had a tough time over the past couple of years, lived with and later married a guy who was sweet and I loved him but he was abusive (verbally/mentally), put me down and let out his own problems (I think he is bipolar, plus stress, obsession over stuff that happened to him years ago etc.) on me by calling me names, shouting at me and making me feel worthless. I finally left earlier this year and got together with someone who cares, is mad about me and treats me with respect - above-mentioned boyfriend!

I had and still have a lot around the ears with moving house, sorting out rent, furniture, insurance, new GP, getting the divorce sorted, work possibly moving to another town etc. etc. The main thing I had to realise was that, no matter how much the thought of lighting up might "relax" me, the dreaded weed does absolutely nothing for solving my problems and my stress, on the contrary it clouds my thinking and makes it HARDER to deal with life!

I'd been on a vitamin complex (Berocca + extra Vit C) and natural "Stress Relief" tablets for two weeks before quitting, and all in all things have been good. I do occasionally start panicking about how "horrible" it is never to be able to take another drag again, at the thought of having to deal with stress/problems without being able to roll a cig and choke myself for a while

But by day 6, I'd already been out for a drink at the pub (luckily, nobody at our table smoked as 3 of us had recently given up and a fourth had never smoked), and had pretty much the most stressful day EVER, and I have not even CONSIDERED giving in and going to the shop!

My chest still feels a bit stuffy but the sweating has stopped and I feel more energetic, plus most importantly I don't STINK any more (nor does my house!) and my sinuses (I had more or less chronic sinusitis) are clearing up slowly but surely.

At the moment though my throat feels sore and my sinuses are giving me trouble - I guess the cleansing process is going to take some time, I just wish there was something other than decongestants that could help me with it (they really hurt my stomach!).

One day I'll be over this though and the amount of money I've saved alone (in spite of not feeling THAT much of a physical improvement) has been worth it!

If anyone wants to post their story please do so!

Red

[This message has been edited by Redhead23 (edited 08-15-2003).]

[This message has been edited by Redhead23 (edited 08-15-2003).]

lidia09 · 08-16-2003, 03:31 PM

Hey Red,
Well done on quitting! You've been through the mill but are a very strong lady & you can do this. I could relate to a lot of what you said & I'm sure your story will help many others.

I gave up 5 years ago after smoking for around 20 years. The hardest place for me to go was the pub as I always had a drink in one hand & a cigarette in the other. At first I drank far too quickly as the cigarette wasn't there but several severe hangovers taught me to slow down

The first month I felt really bad. Weeks 3 & 4 I thought I had coughed up half a lung at least. I read a load of leaflets which told me my sense of smell & taste would soon improve vastly but I have to be honest & say that never did happen for me. My main motive for stopping was the fact I got skin cancer. I got rid of it but felt like I'd had a very lucky escape. The next cancer would likely be from smoking so I quit - learned to respect my body a little more. I think to quit you have to be determined. You read these leaflets which tell you to set a date, tell all your friends etc but I think that just makes it too much of a big deal. I did it much the same as you did. Decided one night & became a non-smoker next day.

So what about your boyfriend, did he stick to his part of the deal too?

My best wishes to you both.
Lidia

Redhead23 · 08-19-2003, 01:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by lidiajamjar:
So what about your boyfriend, did he stick to his part of the deal too?

Hiya,

Well at first he decided to have a few cigs a week (like 1 on Tuesdays and 1 on Thursdays) on the most stressful days at work (well, at the pub afterwards), I guess it's different for someone who so rarely smokes as he is used to not smoking for several days at a time and has no problem with that, then fancies a cig, has 1 and then no more for a few days.

Anyway a week later he decided 2 cigs were silly and he hasn't had one since

Glad to hear you quit as long as 5 years ago, it must be wonderful to be able to say that! It's sad that mostly we need a "kick up the bum" or a health scare to stop us from smoking but it IS an addiction and it does take a lot of guts and willpower to just stop.

I know what you mean about the pub though, but thankfully I do know quite a few people who either never smoked or have given up in the past year, which is brilliant! Went out on Friday (not as long as I would have wanted - got a stomach bug and didn't get to go to the meal I was going to have - ick!) and for once my bf's housemate was the only person at our table (out of up to 7 people) who smoked, whereas usually it used to be his girfriend who was the only person who DIDN'T smoke!

[This message has been edited by Redhead23 (edited 08-19-2003).]