moonbeam21

My mother (66 at the time) had a stroke (small to medicum brain bleed) approximately 10 days after going off of Hormone Replacement Therapy (which she was on for over 20 years). The doctors say that one thing has nothing to do with the other….I am not so sure. The bleed in her right frontal lobe reabsorbed extremely fast, and she did (they think) – possibly suffer an very small bleed one year later – but other than that there have been no other events.

She was very lucky as she has had very little residual effects from the stroke – but she is not herself – and I think it has more to do with the medication they have her on. They say that the stroke was caused by high blood pressure….and as a result she is now on blood pressure medicine(s), anti-seizure medicine and anti-depressant. She does not think clearly anymore, her memory is sketchy sometimes, she is spacey, she seems physically off balance, gets a scratchy throat, her eyes are swollen, she had gained about 30 lbs., she now gets these “migraines” (or that is what the doctors are telling her they are) where her arm will go numb and she continues to have headaches from time to time. The doctors have told here that all of these symptoms are due to the stroke. They have not said that one single symptom could be a result of the medication. She knows that she is not right because she gave up her driver’s license and won’t leave the house without someone. I might also add that my mother had more energy and sparkle than any woman I have ever known (she is a redhead ) prior to her brain bleed.

I was with her 2 days after the stroke when she sat up in bed and seemed like my mother – I was so grateful…but then the doctors said they wanted her blood pressure even lower and started medicating her and I feel as though my now 68 year old mom went away that day. I try to talk to her about her medication and possible side effects – but she seems not to be able to critically think anymore – and only gets upset about my comments. I feel that she is so scared that she will have another stroke at any minute that she is doing minimal living. She lives with her boyfriend of 20+ years that has bought into the “at least she is alive”…leave her alone….and these doctors are the best.

She does have good “doctors” in Chicago – but they don’t think out of the box at all….and I am just so frustrated that they may have turned my mom into a medicine zombie and there is not one thing I can do about it. The old her would have never put up with any of this…and questioned everything…but that woman seems to be gone. My mom has two beautiful grandsons – she rushed to watch each of them being born – they are her greatest love – and they rarely get to see their Grammie anymore – not to mention myself and my husband whom love her dearly. We live in another state – and she will not travel – and it is hard for us all to get there.

I welcome any thoughts from people who have experienced what she has been through – and how they have felt afterward, were they ever over medicated, how were they able to move on from their experiences…any advice at all. If there are any other support persons to a survivor and if they have dealt with any of the same issues - please let me know. We are all lucky that she survived - no doubt - …but it does not seem she is really living…and I believe my mom is in there somewhere – she is only 68 with (hopefully) many more happy years to come. It is with deep gratitude – in advance - that I ask you to share any experience, strength and hope.