I had an Ischemic Stroke in July 2011 due to high blood pressure. At first my whole left side was numb, I couldn't feel anything, move my arm or my leg. After about a week, my arm became useful but from about halfway between my armpit and my hip all the way down my left side to my foot it has stayed numb and I have a burning sensation down deep. Will this ever go away or will I have to continually use a walker to get around? I am only 53 and I hate this feeling of not being able to get in the tub by myself or being able to walk without an aide. I have also had a substantial memory loss, such as my birthdate, my address, phone number, things that have happened to me such as my past, my grandchildrens history, etc. Will I regain any of the memories that I have lost? Are there any therapies that I can do to help this to get better? I also get out of breath very easily, I feel like I have run the 100 yard dash. Any suggestions??
Last edited by Anita N 53; 09-12-2011 at 10:26 PM.
The following 2 users give hugs of support to: Anita N 53 coupe (10-18-2011), Mulchie (09-21-2011)
I am so sorry for what you are going through. I am glad you came to the board because you will get so much help from people going through the same thing. I had a stroke a year ago June 2010. 54 years old. Yes Yes Yes things will get better. I know doctors tell you that if it doesnt come back right away it wont. But that is Bull. I am still improving and it is never over till its over. I needed a wheel chair the first week of my stroke. My leg was effected from the hip down and I had drop foot. Now today, I am walking over half a mile on a tread mil. Yipeeee!!!. It is so easy to get discouraged but when you get down in the dumps come here and kick off an email. Rant all you like and you will be glad you did. Just because you need assistance now doesnt necessarily mean you will need it forever. Yes you will be tired the first months of a stroke your poor brain is trying to deal with whats happened and its trying to heal. Sleep is important dont fight it just do it. I am still having an afternoon nap but I really contribute my healing to the fact that I did sleep when my body was telling me too. A Occupational therapist should be helping you with memory. Look at pictures watch videos but dont push yourself too much you are healing and when the swelling goes down in your brain and you continue to heal things will come back. Please dont give up please stay positive as hard as that seems some days. Energy and exhaustion is a common complaint with stroke. You need to realize this is normal. I am much stronger and can tolerate much more activity. Yes its not all like it use to be but Im not where I was and I am certainly not going to stop in my recovery. Believe in your heart things will get better. You will get stronger, you will begin to remember. I have a friend who suffered a stroke and his left side is still numb but it has not effected his ability to start walking again.
I put a white board on the fridge and every day put the date and what I needed to do. I would forget to take my pills forget what day it was, forget many things including forget to write on the white board lol! But its not like that now. Eat healthy, surround yourself with things that make you smile and laugh, stay positive and you will do well. Remember we are here if you need us. God Bless Mulchie
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Mulchie For This Useful Post: Anita N 53 (09-24-2011), K8S (01-01-2012)
Thanks for the support. I am just getting so disgusted right now. My boyfriend keeps getting upset with me as I am still having to use the walker, he says I am "playing" the stroke thing, that I had a "small" stroke and he also thinks that I am using the stroke to get attention and be lazy. The other day he said that I was a "wannabe cripple". How do I handle this attitude? I get so mad cause I can't do what I am used to doing and I need to get a job SOOOOOO bad, but who is going to hire me, walker and all? I am so worried about my bills and losing my house. Who does he think he is???? Its not like I can stand and cook a whole meal every night or keep the house cleaned up, so I sit or lay on the couch every day, he also gets cranky because there are nights I just cannot sleep so I stay up all night but later in the day, I get so sleepy, its like I have my days and nights mixed up. God..... I am so screwed up!!! Lol
I'm sorry, but I had to rant and rave on here. I am working my left leg by hand and I can use it a little more than when I first had my stroke, but its not happening fast enough for me. The stinging is still there along with the numbness. I get so angry with myself. I know that I should not let him get to me, but its hard, ya know what I mean? If he moves out, then I have NO income at all and I will be totally screwed. I know, worry and high blood pressure gave me the stroke to begin with, but how do you stop it?
My 52nd birthday was in August and I didn't even know it. If it hadn't been for my daughters, it would have went right on by without even being recognized. Sometimes I want to just give up, but if I don't care, who does? Will I ever get over these feelings of being useless????
Your boyfriend does not understand what you are going through. Most people dont understand unless they too have had a stroke. Many times, many many times family and friends made comments and they just crush right through me. What you are going through is hard, and scarry. You need people around you to understand. The people here on the stroke board Really understand because we are all going through it. Everything you are talking about is stroke. The sleep disterbance, not remembering, the weak side and OH THE IMPATIENCE. I want to be well right now dam it!!!! We are all feeling that but you cant rush your healing. Your poor brain took a hit and its sometimes a slow heal. Try to get proper rest, try to stay focused on your progress and continue to move forward. Like I said the healing will continue and you will get stronger but the rest is important. I contribute my healing and how far I have come, because I always got rest when my body asked for it. I know its discouraging and the feeling of being useless OH BOY CAN I RELATE TO THAT. I felt the same way and it still creeps in when Im feeling down. But you are not useless keep telling yourself that. No one has the right to make you feel that way. You have had a stroke and you will heal but it takes time. Dont be so hard on yourself.
Feel free to Rant, that is what we are here for.
God Bless Mulchie
Dear Anita-Mulchie. While we have a lot in vcommon, I don't have the burning sensation or tingles. I get the equivalent of charlie-horses in my left thigh..hurts like heck!! and disrupts my sleep. I got leg function back first..still waiting for arm to behave. I can hear Tim laughing ...it isn't the arm but ME that needs to behave. I too get breathless easily but think that will improve as I become less de-conditioned and am able to get around pain-free. I also have trouble with vertigo on getting out of bed during the night and first thing in the morning. It feels as though half my brain is missing and replaced by water or helium.
This hasn't answered your questions but I think only time will tell for both of us and that in time these foibles will settle down and go away.
What would I do without you? LOL Why is it... I know what you are saying is true, but in my mind it's kinda foggy (not ready to sink in yet)? I go through my days feeling like I am in a hazy fog. I get so disgusted with myself, hobbling around on my bad leg and my arm is just tingling (burning). I can't wait for this to go away. It is slowly getting better, but just not fast enough for me. LOL I have to laugh cause if I don't, I cry. LOL I get so depressed, is it just me?
It took awhile, but I actually cooked dinner yesterday (even tho MOST of it went in the oven and baked) LOL... I had to sit on my walker most of it, but I was proud of myself. (Even tho I almost burned the Chicken... LOL). I was so out of breath when I finally got through...lol. I was proud of myself though. I guess I will have to keep making myself do things to get better cause if I don't, I won't get any better, will I?
Ok, I am through ranting.... I am so outta breath, I could scream (if I had the breath) LOL
Cook dinner that is fantastic. That is not a little task. It involves many steps and consentration I think thats great! congrats!!!!
I come from a farm unbringing so cooking was in me. I loved to cook and my family all loves to eat. But Anita I couldnt bake cupcakes in the beginning. Toast was an effort. This weekend I did mini strawberry short cakes and double chocolate cup cakes with moca whip toping. Oh ya those babies were gooooood. But the first time I tried to bake them it was such a disaster it was funny. My daughter God Bless her laughed her head off at me as I sat with a bunch of crumbled unidentifyable objects that were suppose to be cupcakes. She wasnt laughing on Sunday as she ate my mini strawberry short cakes.
She said Wow mom did you really have a stroke because Im not seeing it. YES YES YES in your face. Anita Im getting better I am better and you will be too. You will find strengths in areas you never new you had. We tend to consentrate too much on what we cant do and not enough on what we can do Because we get stuck in mourning our old life and when your stuck you cant move forward. Trust me I was stuck. Its amazing whats inside us that we never new existed untill we are forced to STOP and sit in the quiet. Work steadily on your recovery and steadily on getting stronger it will come. but dont push yourself too much because then you go 2 steps forward and 3 back and take it from me that gets dam frustrating. Dont over do it every day Get a plan that does not exceed your energy. Coupe always said Accept Analyze and Adapt. Smart smart words and those words have carried me a long way. Dont get depressed, stay positive, and involve some happy things in your life. Watch funny movies, ready funny books. Laughter is healing and it carries us a long way. And if you have to cry, well then do it but do it and get it over with. Someone on the board told me she gives herself 15 minutes every day to feel down right sorry for herself. She cries, yells, and then gets on with her day. Smart!! Take care Anita and keep up the great work. Keep posting and God Bless
I am so sorry for what your going through. That feeling in your head I know exactly what you mean. I am in constant Migraine since the stroke and when its bad oh boy. I am learned how to adapt and how to manipulate them so they are not so bad. You mentioned charlie horses and I thought i would pass this info along. Even before my stroke I would get them really bad during the night. A doctor told me it is a lack of magnizium. Now Magnizium is something you cant just take lots of because that would be dangerous but your calcium should have magnizium in it and if it doesnt you should because they say calcium doesnt know where to go in the body unless it is taking with magnizium But I am no doctor and you really should tell your dr. Since I have been taking the extra I have not had any. Not one. So ask about it. Charlie Horses are terrible. Especially getting woke up in the middle of the night. I always kept the heating pad next to the bad and i would put the heat on it and it would help break it.
My breathlessness is much better now. Its been 15 months since my stroke and I am not out of breath to the extent I was its all getting better as time goes on. My body seems to like it when I do activites within my limits and then I dont get all tired and out of breath. My husband has virtigo and he says its just terrible. He takes a drug for it and it realy helps. I think its called SERK.
Take care Nancy God Bless Mulchie
Dear Mulchie: thank you for both the magnesium and vertigo info. I did tell both my dr. and my PT. Dr. just seemed to dismiss it. I do take a combo calcium and magnesium. I will ask dr. to look more closely about the vertigo as it really becomes frightening and sick-making. I hate having to go back to waking hubby if I need to get up in the night. It seems like a giant step backward.. but it is what it is.
I do not suffer migrains but instead have "fog brain".
Blessings to you for reaching out despite your own challenges.
The following user gives a hug of support to ennbee: Mulchie (09-27-2011)
Nancy the medication My husband takes he starts taking it when he gets the warning signs that he is getting vitigo. Takes a day on the meds to get relief and then he stays on it then for a week or two or more untill the episode subsides and then he goes off it. But he does take it religiously when he is on it and it really helps. Definetly find out about it.
I ment to tell you also that charlie horses can occur from not being hydrated enough too. So make sure your drinking enough water. Apparently when we start to dyhydrate it effects our mussels. Forgive my spelling.
God Bless Mulchie
The Following User Says Thank You to Mulchie For This Useful Post: ennbee (09-28-2011)
Yes, I cooked dinner... BUT I didn't say it was good... lol. Everyone had to force it down with a LOT of drinking tea. Needless to say, my daughetr has taken over the cooking... LOL. I am glad to hear that I am not the only one with headaches. I didn't know that was part of the stroke. I am just grateful for this board so that I can get on here and talk with people that know what I am going thru. Thank God for ya'll.
Well..... it finally happened! My boyfriend/common law husband of 12 years walked out on me. He said he couldn't live with a cripple. How much worse is this gonna get? I couldn't quit using the walker, so he just up and walked out. He said it embarrased him to be seen in public (when I felt like going out) with a cripple anymore. I don't know how much more of this I can take.
The following user gives a hug of support to Anita N 53: Mulchie (10-04-2011)
Oh dear Anita I am so sorry. You did not deserve that. I know he was struggling with the stroke and you mentioned a few times his harshness and unkind words. It is very hard for you to heal and become well under those conditions. You need to stay positive and that is hard to do when someone is constantly feeding you negative comments. I know you are very strong woman by your posts. You will need to be stronger than ever now. You can and you will. The focus is on you and your recovery. The rest of the world is just going to have to wait untill you get there.
You can do this Anita, Keep posting, keep ranting, we are all here for you. We are not walking out on you, we are not ignoring you. We are here for you.
God Bless Mulchie
I know that me having this stroke is something I could not help, it just happened. But how do I stop the depression? All day today I get mad at my boyfriend/common law husband of 12 years, then all I want to do is scream and throw an old time fit. I feel like I am causing misery for everyone that I love, everyone around me. I keep wondering if it would have been better if I had just died, why did they have to get my pulse restarted? Why couldn't they have just let me go? I feel like such a burden to everyone and I feel that the stroke and how it affected me is the reason he walked out on me. He broke his back twice and I never left his side, day and night I stayed at the hospital with him. BUT... where was he when I needed him? Drunk and passed out, that's where.
God... MY HEAD IS KILLING ME!!! What can I do for these headaches? It's like they never let up?
My daughter has to do everything for me, get me out of bed, put me in the shower/tub and get me back out and her with a bad back. I have never been naked in front of ANYONE, now it's like she has to see me everytime I have to have a bath or change clothes. I never thought my kids would have to be the ones taking care of me like this.
I feel so ashamed. You know... I keep thinking... why me? I know I sound like a crybaby as there are people on here in worse shape than I am, why do I feel so sorry for myself? God, I need help and have no idea of where to go to get it, who do I turn to? I hate the feeling of being a charity case. I have always been the one to take care of everyone else, being sure to not let anyone have to take care of me.
All I do now is cry and feel sorry for myself. Disability called and said they can't take my doctors word for my disability, they now want me to go see their doctors. I am here with not a dollar to my name, and my bills are due, my house payment is late..... what can I do? I would feel better if I could just get out of this damn depression, anything to feel better about myself. I am trying to be strong, but for every step I take forward, something seems to come up and knock me 10 steps back. Hold on... someone at my door...
I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS... he JUST showed up and wants me to let him back in MY house. He sat on my porch crying like a baby, saying it was the alchohol talking, not him (usual excuse). I have worked my tail off and I will have MY house paid off in 4 years (with NO help from anyone, I did it on my own, working 2 and 3 jobs, but I did it). He has SOME nerve. I told him to get off of MY property or I would call the cops and have him removed. (Needless to say my blood pressure went up to 238/121. I had to take 3 blood pressure pills to bring it back down along with a Zanax. I finally got him to leave and now he keeps calling me from a motel (that he had NO money to get) begging for another chance. I figure I have put up with his BS for over 10-12 years, but it keeps getting worse everytime. Its like since the stroke, I have FINALLY got my gumption back. I have made up my mind that I don't have to take his BS anymore. It's like his drinking is more important, he has his liquor (cheap wine and MD20/20) BEFORE a single bill is paid. He has only been living here for about 4-5 months, but as of this morning (after I called every jail and hospital within 50 miles being worried about him since he has NEVER left like this) I FINALLY got mad and made up my mine that he is gone for good and will not be back as far as I am concerned. I AM TAKING MY LIFE BACK AND AM GONNA DO THIS FOR ME!!! My daughters say it is about time the OLD me came back out and I fully agree.
Ok, I will shut up now, I feel the need to start screaming again... anyone have ANY suggestions?? I am open to anything...
Thank God for this message board... I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't get on here and rant and rave. God Bless All of ya'll and thanks for being here to listen to me.
Last edited by Anita N 53; 10-04-2011 at 07:30 PM.