Its hard for care givers to understand the whole tired thing. I think stroke is grossly missunderstood to be honest with you. No one truly understands what is going on except others who have suffered a stroke. And that is really too bad because we have been dealt these cards and we are on a journey that not one of us would rather not be on. But we are, and thats the truth of the matter. We are coping we are moving forward and we are doing the very best we can. It is a different world now and we have learned so much from it and from our recovery. But I really truly have found that it is nothing you can wish away, or ignore, or make go away. It is a process we all must work through and no one can say how long thats going to take. I am 2 years stroke recovery and Im amazed at my progress but still struggling with issues that are lingering.
Our care givers struggle to understand what we are going through. Seriously just because the medical background is there it doesnt mean what you are going through can be justly understood by someone who has not had a stroke. I sympathize with you I know what its like to be so tired. It is a different tired and you dont know when its coming on and it smacks you with the deplition no matter what your doing or where you are or what you have to do. And rest, sleep is the only thing that backs it up.
God Bless Mulchie
The Following User Says Thank You to Mulchie For This Useful Post: jlh1 (07-31-2012)
Well, I wish my wife understood the tired thing with stroke. Whats funny is she is a 20+ year R.N. you would think she would understand. She thinks I am just lazy wanting to sleep all the time. She also wants me to increase my working hours to 40 a week. I know I can not work that many hours but she sees no reason I cant. We are not hurting money wise here and my meager income makes no difference in weather the bills get paid or not. She thinks at 7 months post stroke that everything should be as before. I can only do what I can do and no more. I know its not fair to my wife to have to shoulder all the bills and stuff but I don't know what I can do to make it easier for her.
Just curious, has she ever been imjured and how is she after an injury? I asl because my daughters father is the same way. When he gets hurt he is very hard on himself to recover quickly, he wa a prefessional snowboarder and broke almot every bone in his body. He has walked the day after knee surgury and done jumps on a wakeboard two months later. He is constantly telling me I can do things I can not do. I thinks its more the mentality than the specifics that I am trying to get at. Almost like how personal trainers push and push to "help" you, and they dont understand it doesnt work that way with stroke. It's not something you can push your way past. Part of me also thinks that she may think that if you go back to your 40 hours than everything will be back to "normal" and this can be over. Which everyone of us would love if it worked that way.
Do what you can, I think its amazing that you are doing so wekl and back to work at all 7 months later. I pray I will be able to go back to work by then.
"UPDATE" Its been a while, I am happy to report I am still improving! Its a slower improvement but noticeable!. The pins and needles numbness in my left arm and leg is now 80% gone and to tell you the truth I don't really notice it anymore unless I think about it. My vision is great and I continue to drive my stick shift car. Its now been 10 months since my stroke an I believe I can see a light at the far end of the tunnel. At 10 months post stroke the risk of another immediate stroke recurrence is very low. I have full strength in all limbs and those I talk to can not tell I had a stroke at any time. I hope this improvement continues!
The following user gives a hug of support to goldsworthy: stellar7 (09-20-2012)
Read through the entire thread. Beautiful. I have connected with my brain and praise it every day.
However, I can't say I have my full strength and skills back, nor can I forget about the injury because numbness and heaviness remain. Fatigue can vary a great deal from one day to the next. There are other odd changes, emotional changes. I can cry at the drop of a hat which I never did before. I am disorganized, inefficient, prone to errors, barely able to do the minimum.
And, yes, others simply can't understand the change that came upon us, esp. when we are so intent on putting forth a semblance of being as we were. I don't believe we ever can be as before no matter what sort of heroic front we put up. That, I believe, is true for me, anyway. It has been over a year and a half. The best thing is there was no recurrence to which I dedicate myself every day with diet, exercise, avoidance of stress, and daily meditation.
The following 2 users give hugs of support to: tinam7 Mulchie (09-05-2012), stellar7 (09-20-2012)
Well, now I really gone and done it!. I drove my little stick shift car round trip from Tucson all the way to Wisconsin!. Although I did get a little tired along the way I managed to drive 640 miles each day before getting a motel for the might. This trip was 1800 miles each way! not bad for a brain stem stroke survivor with a GIANT fusiform aneurysm in his brain stem!. Although I don't recommend this kind of trip for any stroke survivor at least not alone. I did it and did it alone and unaided. Would I do it again? I dont think so I think next time I will fly up there.
Last edited by goldsworthy; 10-06-2012 at 05:28 AM.
Hello Goldsworthy
Thats what I love about the people on this board. The bravery and courage that is displayed on a daily bases in our every day lives. Fighting the fight, doing the battle and climbing that mountain. No boundries.
Its amazing and wonderful. Congrats!!
You are an inspiration to us all. God Bless Mulchie
Well, I have to echo Mulchie; but, in truth, I had to calm myself just contemplating such a trip. I'm excited going 2-3 miles in an automatic to the rec. center to exercise. Also, I have the idea that being stress free will prevent another brain quake. Next time, suggest Wisc. to come to you (joking). Better yet, just relax and be happy at home.
It is nice not to have to pretend here which is what we do with others who can't really understand what goes on inside........tina
Well, I have to echo Mulchie; but, in truth, I had to calm myself just contemplating such a trip. I'm excited going 2-3 miles in an automatic to the rec. center to exercise. Also, I have the idea that being stress free will prevent another brain quake. Next time, suggest Wisc. to come to you (joking). Better yet, just relax and be happy at home.
It is nice not to have to pretend here which is what we do with others who can't really understand what goes on inside........tina
No pretend here I did drive from Tucson all the way to Wisconsin and back again
Oh I know you didn't pretend about the drive. But I know I pretend that nothing happened and no-one can tell, but I know the difference.
Like Kurt Vonnegut said, "We become what we pretend to be." That can be a good thing. What I like here is that I need not pretend to anything. Today, for example, is a day when I feel more dead than alive. I know why. And I know tomorrow may be something else again. Even later today may be different.
The following user gives a hug of support to tinam7: Mulchie (10-07-2012)
UPDATE; This week I doubled my working hours, the pins and needles numbness has almost gone away completely! My 6th nerve palsy has corrected itself I now only see 1 even without my glasses. My short term memory has improved tremendously!. It is beginning to look like I may have a full recovery my stroke was last December so its going on 1 year ago. Considering I had a massive brain stem stroke my recovery so far has been a miracle to say the least.
That is such good news. Impressive. My anniversary is also December, 2 years ago. You seem to be way ahead of me. Happy for you. Thankfully do not need to work. Too old anyway.
I still have numbness and heaviness, bizarre inefficiency apparently due to that fatigue and sometimes inability to organize. But today was one of the best days I've had. So, clearly, improvement occurs even if sometimes it can seem otherwise. We'll celebrate December.
UPDATE!; My recovery goes on and gets better with each passing day! I drove my car 1800. miles to Wisconsin by myself and then did it again to return home!. I have increased my working hours and now work 5 days a week without trouble. I have my vision returned to me 100% and have full use of my left side that was affected from my stroke. My wife and I went out dancing the Fox trot last weekend!. This coming December will be my 1 year stroke anniversary!.
Last edited by goldsworthy; 11-25-2012 at 06:10 AM.
You are such an inspiration to us all. Very encouraging to read your post. You make me not give up on my driving. I am so happy for you.
God Bless Mulchie
Re: Well, I AM BACK! 
