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Old 04-09-2003, 06:06 AM   #1
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joslin1977 HB User
Red face Concerned Big Sis.

i am not a teen but i have a 19 yo brother who is sexually active and i found out he has been since he was about 15 yo. overall he is a great kid but i am still worried and i want to know from other teenís point of view whether i need to stop worrying. i would like to know what you all think about having sex and whether you all know the risks and dangers involved in having sex now a days and what you are doing to prevent them. i just think about how things were when i was younger and i would like to know how teenagers think now. i know my brother is now old enough to think for himself but he is still my baby brother and i am just worried... thanks guys.

 
Old 04-09-2003, 11:36 AM   #2
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QweenyBluEyes HB User
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I would just say don't bring the past into the present. As a sixteen yr old I wouldn't suggest having sex at that age. I'm one who is only going to have sex until I am married. You're brother has already made his own decisions so I would suggest not to worry about it, because there is nothing you can do about it.
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Old 04-09-2003, 12:24 PM   #3
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siren24 HB User
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Hi joslin.... I know exactly how you feel! I'm 22 and I have a 17 year old brother who has been sexually active with his g/f. We just found out, but we believe it could've been as long as 2 years. (Same girl.) They actually resorted to stealing my birth control pills when I was still living at home. (That's why I got pregnant 1 month after my wedding.. lol.) My mom has been worried sick, but it's been nearly impossible to control them since they sneak around. I don't know what to tell you, except I really do understand your concern. I think you have a good reason to be worried, and it shows how much you care about your brother. There is so much trouble with sex out there, and teenagers think they are old enough to deal with consequences and make "mature, responsible decisions" because they read that in teen mags and hear it from sex ed teachers. But I'm not that far removed from my teenage years, and I realize that just a few years ago, I didn't have a clue what maturity or responsibility was. Have you tried talking to him? My brother seems to listen to and respect me more than my mother right now, because he resents her for trying to curb his sex life. I just had a sit down with him and told him from my heart how I felt and what I'd learned. Did he listen? Not sure. But he seems to be behaving with a little more class than he was before.

 
Old 04-09-2003, 01:00 PM   #4
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joslin1977 HB User
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siren, thanks for your reply. i know this may sound bad but im just glad im no the only one who is concerned about my brother. everyone is telling me not to worry and it's not a big deal but those are coming from my guy friends, whom i realized recently, i can not get any advice from them about my brother. anyhow, im 25 yo and i have a sister who is 22, just like you. she actually got pregnant and got married to a great guy but she was not ready and she was even taking birth control but she still got pregnant. don't get me wrong, we love the baby and he's the best but i know my sister was not ready to be a mom or was she ready to marry. even with that my brother is still doing it. i found out he wasn't even wearing a condom. and it's not only getting a girl pregnant but there are lots of STDs going around lately. we did talk about it and he seemed as though he understood but you know how it was being a teen, you thought nothing could happen and that everyone just worries to much, at least i used to think so. anyhow, thanks again for taking your time out to read my worry and responding.

 
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