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Old 05-01-2003, 04:58 PM   #1
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A few days ago my bf and I broke up because he came to school high. I didn't care if he smoked with his friends just as long as he wasn't high around me. So I wrote him a really long note saying we should break up if he didn't quit coming to school stoned and at the end of the day he made it official. The last thing he said to me was "f this" and he hasn't talked to me since and now he hangs out with this other girl and I'm really depressed. Was I wrong in controlling him like this?

 
Old 05-01-2003, 05:25 PM   #2
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No WAY! you don't want to be with a guy like that. I know its REALLY depressing, but you'll get over it with time. Be careful who you give your heart too.
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Old 05-01-2003, 06:26 PM   #3
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HELL NO!!!! Dude, obviously (I dont mean to sound mean) but this guy is a JERK! He said f this to you after its HIM that was the idiot for doing that to you..you dont need a freakin pot smoker who acted so stupid anyway. i say, get over it ITS SO HARD i know, and i dont mean to sound mean, but try just concentrating on something else for a while, education possibly, as geeky as that sounds..but give the guys a rest maybe for a little? ignore him completely, make him feel like he got the loss..cause he did you dont need someone like that. as time moves on, i assure you, you will find someone else and be glad for what happen. later homies

 
Old 05-01-2003, 06:54 PM   #4
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Why did you not want him to be high around you? Do you not like the way he acts or just don't like the fact that he's doing drugs, or some other reason?

 
Old 05-01-2003, 06:56 PM   #5
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well.. it is his choice..
and you really shouldn't make him pick between things like that.. that's kinda mean..
unless he like got outta control when he was high or something..
maybe you should hook up with a guy who doesn't smoke weed?

 
Old 05-01-2003, 08:21 PM   #6
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Good on you! If he was doihng something you weren't comfortable with, you were smart and brave to get out. You weren't controlling him-he's still making his choice and smoking pot-be glad you got out when you did.

Hang in there, you will get better, time heals.

 
Old 05-02-2003, 05:06 AM   #7
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I used to fight with my boyfriend (of almost 3 years) because he was smoking pot and lying to me about it. His best friend told me he was, and I told my boyfriend that if he was smoking pot I wouldn't be mad, but I also gave him the chance to tell me and I wouldn't be mad at me. We ended up breaking up for a few months, but we're back together now, and he's only smoked once... and he told me about it too. So there was no way I could get mad at him.
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Old 05-02-2003, 11:48 AM   #8
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I dont know why it bothers me, it just does. He doesn't really act that much different but I hate kissing him when he's high. Also, a few of my family members were heavy pot smokers and dropped out of school, lost control, etc. Does the fact that I don't except him doing this mean I don't love him? Does the fact he won't quit mean he doesn't love me? I'm so confused :-( thanks for all the replies.

 
Old 05-02-2003, 11:57 AM   #9
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No, him doing pot doesnt mean he doesnt love you but then again..what is love? I mean, some of us, very few some of us know what love really is, were still in high school. I dont know you or him so I couldnt say exactly but maybe he loves you and the pot's controlled his body to the point that he still loves you but just cant give it up...also you not expecting this just makes you love him more i would think. It shows you love and care for him, give it some time, hell realize what he did..if not, hes not worth it..dont you forget that.

 
Old 05-02-2003, 11:59 AM   #10
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No, him doing pot doesnt mean he doesnt love you but then again..what is love? I mean, some of us, very few some of us know what love really is, were still in high school. I dont know you or him so I couldnt say exactly but maybe he loves you and the pot's controlled his body to the point that he still loves you but just cant give it up...also you not expecting this just makes you love him more i would think. It shows you love and care for him, give it some time, hell realize what he did..if not, hes not worth it..dont you forget that.

 
Old 05-03-2003, 11:00 AM   #11
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His priorities are way off. If he cares more about drugs and getting high, then you definately did the right thing. You need to find someone who is clean and respects your opinions and wishes in regards to drugs etc. He's not worth anything, and you had every right in the universe to do what you do. At least you're not wasting your time anymore.
Seriously though, you need to be with someone who is clean, and doesn't want any parts of drugs or being high. Good luck, you deserve it

 
Old 05-06-2003, 05:59 PM   #12
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To DanaJ - Just because someone uses marijuana, it doesn't make them a bad person or a waste of time to be with. What about people who drink alcohol? Although more socially acceptable, they are just as bad as potsmokers. Alcohol is just as bad as marijuana. In many ways, it's probably worse than marijuana. If you chose to stay away from people who don't do drugs, that's fine, but I feel I must comment on the fact that people who smoke marijuana are not bad people.

[This message has been edited by Andrew29 (edited 05-06-2003).]

 
Old 05-07-2003, 02:47 PM   #13
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You made a good point Jadyn...Are you saying I shouldn't care that he smokes pot?

 
Old 05-07-2003, 03:57 PM   #14
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Totally not gurl it was the right desicion. I just broke up with my b/f because I didn't like it when he was stoned around me and soon after he told me he realized he wanted to change. And guess what ? He has....even when I'm not around I hear it from everybody that he won't smoke anymore. My point is that if he really truly cared about you and the relationship, he would quit.

 
Old 05-07-2003, 05:20 PM   #15
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Really Dancer girl? How long did he take to come around? I really miss him and I know I did the right thing but..I dunno if I can make it..

 
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