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Old 05-20-2003, 08:51 AM   #1
True*Love*Waits
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Post Sound Like A Soap Opera???

Ok. I just got in a very messy situation. But I think I came out pretty good. I don't know how to explain it all but I am going to try my best. And I want you all's innermost thoughts on what I should have done and all.
Ok first off, I was dating this guy. We'll call him Billy. Billy was a pretty good guy he drank on occasion (which I hated) and he wasn't a virgin (which I said I wouldn't date a guy that wasn't a virgin -my own choice, don't start a big thing on that please-). So, Billy and I had been going out for about 3 weeks. My best friend (We'll call her Amy) liked his best friend (who we'll call Tyler). Well. The other weekend Billy and Tyler came over to fix my mom's break light. Tyler and I hit it off really well.
Some background info. Tyler never liked Amy, and Amy seemed to think Tyler really liked her. Though Tyler never talked to her and rarely was around her. But Amy made up a fantasy in her mind, because Tyler is a great guy and she wanted him to like her.
I came to find out that weekend. That Tyler doesn't really drink (very rare occasion that he does.) He is a virgin. And he's a Christian!!! Major plus for me. Well. He was having ex g/f problems and I was kind of there to see him through it all.
Billy got mad and called me up the Monday after that weekend that we all hung out. He told me that Tyler liked me and that I could have time off and think about who I wanted or we can continue going out. Well. I took the freedom.
Now. That started a really big mess between the two of them. They argued for a few days, but Tyler said he was not going to drop me because of the mess it had caused. Tyler had wanted a girl with my standards, and he finally found one and he was not going to let her out of his sight if he had any choice in it. He said he had already gone through enough mess, he was going to keep on going in hopes that I would end up being his.
So, they talked for a few days and finally they decided that they're friendship wasn't worth dropping just over a girl. So Billy gave up and said he was ok with me and Tyler being together. So all is good in that neck of the woods.
Then we have Amy. Well. Amy was heartbroken. Her little fantasy broke and she realized that her and Tyler never really had anything. She hated me for him liking me and hated me for Billy and I breaking up (Billy is one of her closest friends). So. I got called every name under the sun and she said she didn't want me as a friend anymore and that friends don't do this to each other. I pointed out that Tyler never really liked her and why he liked me and it became a big mess. (side note - Tyler is a virgin, and he wants to be with a virgin. He plans on staying a virgin till he is married- we both have the same views on this-) Amy is not a virgin. And I think she was really mad that Tyler liked that quality in me. She called him a wuss for not being willing to do anything with a girl, and called me a wuss for not being willing to sleep with a guy. In the end. She gave up and is ok with me and Tyler.
So. He and I have gone through all this together so far. Neither of us backed down. And we still don't plan on it. We get along really well. We're not officially 'dating' yet. But we enjoy being around each other and there's not really anyone else in either of our lives. and I don't think there will be for awhile. What do you all think of all this mess? Do you think it is worth it? I have 5 standards I have set for dating.
I want:
A Virgin
A Christian
A Non Drinker
A Non Druggie
No Dipping and No Smoking.

He is all of those. He is not a heavy drinker and he only drinks like 2-3 times a year. Which honestly. I don't have a problem with. So. Was it worth it? I think so.

------------------
True Love Waits, so if it's true love. They will also be waiting for you. "Live Life to the Fullest. Live it Straight and Don't Die Young"

 
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Old 05-20-2003, 10:23 AM   #2
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Wa, USA
Posts: 195
QweenyBluEyes HB User
Post

You know what? Billy and Amy sound like they have a lot in common.. maybe they should hook up?? Sorry that's kinda off subject, but it was the first thing that came into my mind.

I too have the same standards as you. I started liking a guy who was all opposite of that, found out it was a BIG mistake. Nothing happened, I just figured out that he was definitely someone I did not want to be with. Luckily he showed his true colors to me..

Anyways, congrats on finding a guy like that! I'm still searching for one..
__________________
Quitters always lose, and winners never give up.

 
Old 05-20-2003, 12:14 PM   #3
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Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: madison, wi usa
Posts: 972
Karla HB User
Post

I think that if you have found someone that could potentially be the one that you owe it to yourself to explore the possibility. Everything worked out and I think that is because everyone knew it was for the best.

 
Old 05-20-2003, 04:12 PM   #4
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Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: FL USA
Posts: 333
UF baby HB User
Post

It's all about priorities. I personally would never date any guy my friend liked before I did, and my friends wouldn't do that to me but I dunno anything about your friendship with this girl..

 
Old 05-21-2003, 09:08 AM   #5
True*Love*Waits
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Post

Uf Baby,
You have a point. And with any of my other friends. My friend would have been my top priority. And not to say she shouldn't have in this case. But she has made out with 5 of my ex-bf's and slept with 2 of them. So. The priority thing. ha. Not happening. She's not the best friend in the world, and somewhere along the lines you have to decide what is better for you. A good guy or a bad influence friend. So, when you know all that. Were my priorities off?

------------------
True Love Waits, so if it's true love. They will also be waiting for you. "Live Life to the Fullest. Live it Straight and Don't Die Young"

 
Old 05-21-2003, 05:11 PM   #6
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 1,065
Dramaqueen HB User
Post

Usually I wouldn't say this, because you want to be goodto your friends, but just go for it. You and Tyler sound like your made for each other.

 
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