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Old 06-13-2003, 12:24 PM   #1
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benman2002 HB User
Post parents, college, drinking....

hey--i am a 19yr old soph. at auburn university. my parents have been paying for tuition and books, while i have been paying rent, food, whatever else.

i would like to stress that i am not the avg. college kid that does not work. i am currently on my work term of co-op (i do work a semester, school a semester, and so on) and the pay is equivelent to about a 25g/yr job. i view my self as an adult because i act like an adult. my job is 40hrs a week and i live by my self

when i was in highschool i used to party ALOT, but by the end of my senior year i had chilled down. my parents found out about my party habbits right before i left for college and told me to stop which i already had (not for their reasons) because i was trying to get in shape

now at college i am around alchohol ALL the time. i rarely drink too much anymore and if i do it is not on purpose. baiscly i drink sometimes with meals and sittin around the house with friends, also at partys so i dont feel like im the only one not drinking

last night my parents called me and asked me if i drink at all anymore. i am a pretty honest person so i told them the truth. they didnt yell, and were'nt mad at all just said matter-a-factly that if i continued to drink that they would cease giving me $ for tuition and books. they gave me a week to decide and tell them im going to do

now here's what im having trouble with. i am not an alcholic so i do not need the drinks. yet for me to honestly say to them that i am going to stop would be a lie and i would rather not lie. it is not a problem, i dont drink and drive, dont get drunk, i make good grades. i just have no interest in giving up drinking. it would be like asking a non alcholic adult who drinks to stop, they could if they really wanted to, but just have no interest in stopping

i dont know anything about getting college loans or grants(i dont even know if i would be eligible because my parents are very well off), now i am scared about paying for school, and loans when i graduate

any parents out there who could give me some non-biased advice????

(sorry about spelling and grammer!!!hope i was clear about what i was trying to say)

 
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Old 06-13-2003, 01:06 PM   #2
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Wow, tough subject...
It hasn't been that long since I got out of college (I'm 25) so I'll give this a shot.
If you were to apply for student loans, you would probably only get them if your parents pay for NOTHING... you'd have to be taken off of any insurance they pay for, etc. You'd have to be totally independant. That's why I understand, at least.
Are you a good student? Would you be able to get any scholarships or grants regarding your area of study? You'd be surprised at how much money is out there for education that no one tries to get!
I don't like to support underage drinking, but I think your parents are being a little naive expecting a college student to completely quit drinking. My parents are fairly conservative like that, as I'm sure I will be - no parents WANT their kid to drink while underage - but my parents told us from high school on that they understood that if we wanted to try it, we probably would, and that we could always call them to come and get us if we didn't have a ride and we'd not get into trouble as long as we were "responsible" and honest. Even with that permission, I never had a drink until I went on to college...
So, the way I see it, if you don't want to give up drinking, and you don't want to lie to your parents (can't blame you for that), the only other choice I can think of is to have have them stop declaring you a dependant and go look for money for school.
Good luck.

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Old 06-13-2003, 02:01 PM   #3
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benman2002 HB User
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response to academics i doubt i can get scholarship $ for my grades -- i currently have a 3.07 gpa not bad at all but not great either...

anybody else have suggestions/comments?

 
Old 06-13-2003, 02:17 PM   #4
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Aleii HB User
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First step you need to do is fill out a FAFSA (stands for federal application for student aid, or something like that) form.
You may need this past year's income tax forms that you filled out. Since you are making so much a year you probably won't need to worry about having to get your parent's signature for school loans.

Go to your school's financial aid office and ask they should have a rack with packets and this FAFSA form. I suggest you discuss with them your options after filling out this form. You should be able to fairly easily get loans for your schooling especially if you are going to a public university or a public junior college.

The main thing I'd say that a person whose parents aren't helping them out with college would have to worry about is paying for their rent and books every semester. But you seem to be making a fairly good deal of money already so that shouldn't be a problem for you.


 
Old 06-16-2003, 09:12 AM   #5
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benman2002 HB User
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thanks for the advice so far..

i told my parents lastnight that i will pay for my own school instead of the other option..this was a big shock to them, i am starting to think that they were bluffing about this whole thing inorder for me to do what they want. now that they see i am serious i think they might cave in. they are going to call me this week some time to tell me what they have decided

 
Old 06-16-2003, 02:23 PM   #6
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Magnetic HB UserMagnetic HB User
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Well, I do think their restrictions are a little unreasonable. If you drink reasonably and responsibly, and use your own money, they should give you some latitude.

However, they are free to set the rules for their money, and you are free to reject it. It will be interesting to see if a compromise is worked out.

If not, and you give up their money just so you can imbibe what is certainly a mind altering drug, you will be he hero to many.

 
Old 06-16-2003, 02:24 PM   #7
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Well, I do think their restrictions are a little unreasonable. If you drink reasonably and responsibly, and use your own money, they should give you some latitude.

However, they are free to set the rules for their money, and you are free to reject it. It will be interesting to see if a compromise is worked out.

If not, and you give up their money just so you can imbibe what is certainly a mind altering drug, you will be a hero to many.

 
Old 06-16-2003, 02:24 PM   #8
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Join Date: May 2003
Location: Florida
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Magnetic HB UserMagnetic HB User
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Well, I do think their restrictions are a little unreasonable. If you drink reasonably and responsibly, and use your own money, they should give you some latitude.

However, they are free to set the rules for their money, and you are free to reject it. It will be interesting to see if a compromise is worked out.

If not, and you give up their money just so you can imbibe what is certainly a mind altering drug, you will be a hero to many.

 
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